12 - Don't go

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Hi everybody! Thank you again for all your love to my story. This chapter contains a brief description of the panic attack... Stay strong and be safe!

Remember: Scott's POV is written in bold and italic font.

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I was walking back to the table, coffee in my hand and a big doughnut for Scott as a sweet surprise. I knew that something was very wrong when I saw Scott's eyes. They had an odd expression, the mix of sadness, surprise and anger. They had grayish color. How is that even possible? They supposed to be blue as the ocean. What the hell?

"Scotty? I left you alone for just 5 minutes and you look like someone ate your favorite meal... Talking about food - I have a doughnut for you. Surprise!"

"Talking about surprises..." replied acidly "...So...U haven't seen this account, right?"

And he showed me the screen of my phone, the Twitter app opened on the @Scomiche2018 page. My mouth is dry and I am not sure, that I will be able to speak.

"Scott..."

"No Mitch, what the fuck?! Was that some kind of a sick joke? Did you have fun? Goddamn! Why? Just tell me why and maybe I will understand and maybe ... maybe ... I will stop to be so disappointed." He said that with a poker face and that is scary, because I've never seen such a cold expression of his body.

"Scott please this is a not good place for such discussion. Can we talk about that later? Can we walk maybe? We don't have here a lot of privacy." I tried not to sound nervous.

"This is perfect place and perfect time. I need answers Mitch and please don't lie to me," said Scott coldly.

I sighed and agreed: "OK... What do you want to know?"

"Why did u create that account?"

"It seemed to me like the best solution." My voice was so quiet.

"Best solution? Of what?" he was obviously confused. God this will be hard!

"I needed to repair what I destroyed..."

He looked at me with eyes wide opened: "Destroyed? Mitch u are the kindest person I know. You are not be able to hurt a fly. I am sure, you didn't destroy anything..."

"Us. I destroyed us." I said it. I want to hide under the table right now.

"Mitchy..." I didn't know what to say. He has a boyfriend, I have my boys, if someone is destroying us, it's us. We are destroying ourselves. "I guess Beau is worth it. You are happy and that is all that matters."

"He was not worth it. I loved him, but I shouldn't allowed cutting you from my life." He sounded do sad.

"...Was...? Am I missing something?" I asked, even that time I put one and one together. Past tense plus Beau's kiss equals breakup.

"We broke up a few weeks ago..."

As I thought. Is this changing anything? Should I be sad or happy? My head is killing me...

"Scott? Are u OK?" asked Mitch. He looked smaller and smaller.

"What?" I was so lost in my thoughts.

"I asked you, if you are OK? You are pale. I am so sorry that I am making you feeling uncomfortable."

"Oh... No! I just... It is so much to handle... What about the Twitter?"

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