Far Cry 5 | One-shots

Joseph x Deputy

Joseph watched as the Deputy made faces at the laptop resting on their lap. He wasn't sure what they were doing but his guess was they were reading one of those cheesy articles from Cosmo. It was a guilty pleasure of their's and as much as he tried to be considerate, he couldn't help but to make a snarky comment when he caught a glimpse of what the Deputy was reading.

With a sigh, Joseph set the remote down on the end table beside of him and pulled the blankets up over his body causing the laptop to shift and eventually fall off of Rook's lap. They glared at him and re-positioned the laptop.

"What was that look for?" Joseph asked with a chuckle.

"I'm reading something very important," Rook mumbled, "And what this is telling me is you don't love me."

"What?!" Joseph asked, "Are you really going by what a random magazine says about our relationship?"

"A relationship expert wrote this!" They argued as they turned the laptop to face Joseph, "You see that? She is also a sex therapist, celebrities have even went to her!"

Joseph crossed his arms over his chest and huffed. It was late and he was ready for bed but he decided to amuse the Deputy so neither would go to bed angry at each other, "What does it say?"

Rook cleared their throat and sat up straight, "According to number 7, if he says 'We're soulmates.' he isn't in it for the long run. How many times have you said that to me?!"

Joseph watched as the Deputy continued reading off bogus 'facts' from the article. The way their eyebrows furrowed in anger as they read off a certain 'tell-tale sign' made Joseph chuckle and the Deputy stopped reading to glare at him once again.

"Hun," He said and placed his hand on their thigh, "I'm a guy and I can tell you this is bogus. Just because a guy tells you about his stressful day doesn't mean he's cheating. That makes no sense."

"But she's an expert," The Deputy repeated, "Do you really love me? Am I wasting my time?"

Joseph sighed and shook his head, "Yes, I love you. No, you're not wasting your time. I think it's time you turned the laptop off for the night and maybe stopped reading those articles."

Rook looked from the laptop to Joseph. Maybe he was right. With a sigh, Rook went to close the tab with the article open but stopped and squinted their eyes at Joseph. Maybe he was playing a game and just wanted them to believe he loved them.

"What now?" He asked

"You're doing exactly what the article says you would do," They whispered, "I knew you were just using me."

Joseph ran his hands over his face and groaned, "I'm not using you, I love you. Are you really letting an article written by a stranger who has never met us get in your head and tell you that I'm using you and don't love you?"

Rook continued to stare at Joseph, not blinking their eyes. A smile slowly spread across Joseph's face and the Deputy laughed along with him then shut the laptop and put it on the floor beside them.

"OK, maybe I have been reading too many articles. But, many of the readers swore by them and said it saved them many times from wasting their time with the wrong person."

Joseph ran his hand up and down the Deputies arm soothingly, "I promise you're not wasting your time, I do love you very much.. Even though you read those Cosmo articles."

Rook smacked his chest playfully, "Don't make fun of my guilty pleasures," The Deputy mumbled as they cuddled closer to Joseph and rested their head on his chest.

"You don't still believe that article, do you?" Joseph asked as he opened one eye and looked at the Deputy.

They shook their head and mumbled a "No."

"Good," Joseph chuckled and pulled them closer to him to where they were halfway on top of him. The Deputy adjusted themself and straddled his waist. He opened both his eyes now and stared up at the love of his life. The way they looked down at him flooded him with many emotions and he wasn't sure what to do with them.

"Kiss me," He said and the Deputy wasted no time in leaning down and planting a kiss on his lips, "That's my baby," He wrapped his arms around the Deputies waste and fell asleep listening to their breathing.