<Week One>
So... Justin's been here for an entire week and things have been... Pretty good.
He's talking a little more.
He was trying to eat.
And I haven't heard him throwing up or anything.
He still flinches a little if I try to touch him. And I still wonder why that is.
We were currently watching a movie, well Justin was watching the movie. I was watching him.
"C-Cassie?"
"Yeah?"
"Y-you're staring." He mumbles.
"I'm sorry..." I say, looking away for a few seconds. I look down at his wrist. It was covered on tattoos. As well as the other one.
"You like tattoos?"
"Y-yeah..."
"Why?"
"I-it's a w-way to e-express myself."
"Oh..."
Since he's been here. He hadn't looked at me. I mean he did once, but... It was quick.
"Justin... Why won't you look at me?" I ask. He shrugs his shoulders.
"Don't you think I'm pretty?" I ask.
"Y-yeah..."
"Then why won't you look at me?"
He sniffles a little, biting his lip. I reach out to touch him, causing him to flinch.
"I'm not going to hurt you. You don't have to be afraid of me."
"I-I'm not."
"Then what is it?"
"W-What is what?"
"Why do you flinch when I try to touch you?"
He looks down at his hands that were fiddling with his shirt.
"I-I h-haven't had sex in a while.."
"I know. But what does that have to do-"
"I'm sexually frustrated Cassie. And I have been for two years. And the past week... I've tried everything to keep from... Jumping on you. And part of it, is not letting you touch me or looking into your eyes."
My heart was beating so fast. Each word sounded as if he was straining. And I could see his breathing increase.
"H-how... How long have you been... Sexually frustrated?"
"Since I was admitted to the hospital. Two years ago."
"You don't masturbate?"
"I've tried... But it doesn't feel the same."
This is the weirdest conversation I've ever had.
"W-why are w-we talking a-about m-my non existent s-sex life?" He mumbles.
"Because... You need... Y-you need to..."
"Have sex?" He finishes my sentence.
"Well... Yeah."
"B-but why?"
"Do you every get frustrated?" I ask.
"Y-yes."
"Do you get angry?"
"A-all the time."
"And you're having nightmares... Right?"
He looks down, fiddling with his shirt. "Yeah."
"There's your answers." I say.
He huffs. "C-Cassie..."
"Justin... I'm your friend. I want to help. I want you to get better. And... It hurts that I can't touch you or hug you with out you pulling away." I look down at my hands that were in my lap. Suddenly, I see his hand cover mine.
He sighs. "I-I'm sorry."
"I-it's okay... I understand you're scared. But... You don't have to be afraid of me." I say sweetly.
He nods his head, looking down at our hands. He grabs mine in his, placing it to his lips. Instantly I feel chills go up my spine.
"Y-your hands are soft." He says kissing it.
"So are your lips." I say softly, biting my lip. He opens my hand placing it on his cheek, closing his eyes as he winces at the unfamiliar feel. My thumb rubs his chubby cheek, as a soft sigh escapes his lips.
"How does it feel?" I ask.
"A-amazing..." He stammers, opening his eyes to look at me.
And we stayed like that. Staring into each others eyes as I rubbed his cheek. There was something in his eyes. Something than I haven't seen in a long time.
Hope.
(A/n: OMG! You guys are not ready for what's coming. I needs comments. Comments give me motivation. If you don't comment, I don't know if I should continue. So please... Comment:)
