A House Full of Brothers

Chapter 21

  I woke up at one in the afternoon to Blake and Kyle talking. It looked like Blake had been up for a while since he was dressed and his hair was done. Kyle had come to take me home because my brothers had been calling repeatedly telling him how worried they were.

  When I walked into the front door Cole was the first person to hug me. Eventually everyone had rounded through with hugs, except for Jason. He looked guilty and sad but obviously not enough to forgive me let alone hug me. I stayed silent, waiting for them to start and shockingly when they did speak, it wasn't about how my absence from school would affect my year of perfect attendance.

  "Brooklyn... why didn't you talk to us?" Justin asked as he swayed on his feet with his arms crossed.

"You guys never listen." I mumbled while avoiding eye contact.

"Of course we do." Chase spoke up. He wasn't trying to be mean, he was genuinely confused as to how I felt that way.

"No you don't. No matter what I say, it's always your guys' choice." I spoke a bit louder than previously - purely out of confidence, but I knew I'd soon be speaking loud and clear due to infuriation that would be quick to run through me.

"Why didn't you come to me?" Cole asked, looking hurt.

"Well what would you do? You'd only tell me what everyone else says."

"I may not be able to really do something but talking helps." Cole tried to reason.

"I don't like talking to you guys. If I say anything slightly wrong or off-tone you guys go off on me." I glanced around the room and for once everyone was listening to what I had to say.

"What about Kyle?" Jax suddenly popped in.

"I talk to him about everything. He doesn't completely understand though. Plus, he's leaving soon anyways. What am I gonna do then?"

"Talk to Blake?" Chase suggested, that only got him glares from all brothers. He put his hands up in defense, "I'm just saying. He's not going anywhere with those grades so at least he'll stick around."

"Blake isn't good for her, you idiot." Jackson was quick to put the idea to an end but I wasn't.

"Oh my god." I groaned, rubbing my temples. "If you guys can be exactly like him, why can't I hang out with him?" My shy and calm tone-of-voice was now more frantic and angry.

"He'll find a way into your pants, and use you, and leave you." Alex answered.

"I'm not that weak-minded, thank you very much." I snapped back sarcastically with a roll of my eyes.

"You don't have to be weak minded. He's not an idiot, Brooklyn. He's smart - I'll give him that - but he'll figure out how to manipulate you." Justin tried to make it all make sense.

"You guys have been manipulating me my whole life!" I threw my arms in the air.

"How?" Chase asked, thinking I didn't have a valid answer.

"Blocking me off from all media. Only allowing me to have one friend. Making me pass everything through you. I'm not stupid."

"How the hell is that manipulative?" Chase back-fired with squinted eyes.

"It's almost like a little mind game you guys play. All of those little tricks were to make me trust you and make me depend on you. Wether you did that on purpose or subconsciously, it was all to make me completely dependent on you guys; to make me incapable of doing things on my own. It was all to keep me in the dark of everything." I looked at all of the boys, some of which looked ridiculously confused and deep in thought while the others looked caught off guard and slightly offended.

"What do you mean, Brooklyn?" Alex breathed out.

"I don't know what the hell is going on anywhere in the world. I'm completely oblivious! You guys won't tell me what happens on those Saturdays where you aren't back until 4 am. Or on Wednesdays where half of you come home with your eyes more red than lava. Everything you guys do is kept as a secret while every tiny thing I do is displayed on a jumbo screen. You guys expect me to accept it because you think lying to me and keeping me in the dark for years will make me believe you, but it doesn't work that way." I rant on.

"You're not making any sense, Brooklyn..." Justin spoke slowly.

"This is why I don't tell you guys anything." I threw my head back. "You guys have lied to me for years. Have kept dozens of secrets from me. Don't let me watch TV, let alone the news. You guys think that banning me from all things outside of this house will keep me safe and keep your secrets safe. I understand a lot of this was done to protect me and I appreciate the thoughts but I feel like I'm trapped. It may be safer for me, but it really only hurts me." My small speech began at a loud volume but it slowly faded into a soft and hurt voice. "If you put a bird in a cage, it is basically guaranteed protection from all things outside of the cage. But when it has no room to move, and only left to think, how happy can it really be? Or what about when the bird finally leaves the cage? It'll die because it has no idea what happens beyond those damn bars." I didn't like it but I had to put into an analogy for them. I always hated analogies and found them cheesy, but it was the only way I could get them to process what I was saying.

  "Brooklyn, we only do it cause we love you." Jackson tried to take a calming step towards me but I jolted backwards to avoid his touch.

  "You guys seriously don't listen to a word I say do you? All you guys do is make me anxious and irritated and miserable." I said the last sentence slowly, giving them all direct eye contact. When they all stayed silent, at a loss for words - I ran up the stairs to my room.

—————