Don't Let Me Go

Not for long.

RECAP: 

"I cant believe I can call him Mine."

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Asa eventually left. My heart was still pounding and my stomach was getting butterflies over the thought that I am now Asa's girlfriend.  "Hey mom, You don't think Asa just asked me out because he feels bad im in the hospital, right? Maybe he eventually caught on and now realizes that I like him and is just asking me out so I dont get my feelings hurt-", I got cut off. "Em! stop! I can tell he likes you. He wouldnt have come over here and asked you out like that. Trust me. He is a nice boy. He wouldnt do that to you. You are beautiful and I can bet that he is at home smiling at the fact that you are now his girlfriend." My mom always has a way to cheer me up. 

I was getting hungry so I asked my mom if she could go pick up something good so i didnt have to eat hospital food. She agreed. When she left, I sighed and it finally hit me that for 1. I was in the hospital and 2. that i might have cancer. Last night we werent sure. But I think they would have been in here by now to tell me is i was okay and if I could go home. Right? I got my phone out and saw a text from Asa. 

I already miss you. I hope you are feeling better. <3

I smiled and said I miss you too. 

I was getting bored from checking my Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr newsfeed nonstop so I decided to turn on the tv and hope that there was at least a decent show on. There wasnt. 

I heard a knock at the door. That couldnt be my mom already, she just left. Someone peeked in. It was Dr. Whitmore. Oh no. Why is she in here? "Hey Emily, how are you feeling?" the doctor asked. "Um nervous that you are in here." I said trying not to sound bitchy. "Haha totally normal, Hey where is your mom, I have to tell you guys something." She said in a tone that didnt sound happy or sad. "She just left to get me food, why? Am I going home? Finally!" I said thinking that she might say "yes". "Em, I'm afraid not." Dr. Whitmore said. She walked over and rubbed my head and was heading to the door and said "Hit the nurse button when your mom comes back, okay?" "Okay."

She shut the door behind her. I started crying. This is it. I have cancer. I am going to die and I will never be able to marry the man of my dreams. I am not going to be able to go to college or have kids.

I was bawling. I was trying to be as quiet as I could but it wasnt working. I looked on my lockscreen on my phone of a picture of Asa and I. I wispered "Thank you for dealing with all my shit." A couple minutes passed and I heard my door creek. I wiped my eyes and sniffed my nose to act like I wasnt just crying. "Hey Em, whats wrong?" My mom asked. I didnt say a word I just picked up the little bed remote and hit the nurse button. 

It took Dr. Whitmore about 2 minutes to get in here and she sat my mom down. 

"How are you?" the Whitmore asked my mom. "Good, you?" my mom said back. "Not so good." Whitmore said. My mom sighed and I started crying some more.

"Emily's tests results came back and her white blood cells were extremely low in her body. Lower than when she came in. I did more research and I am afriad to say that she has a type of Leukemia called "Acute Lymphocytic" also known as "ALL". Acute Lymphocytic is when immature white blood cells overproduce in the bone marrow. That is why she lost the cells in her body because they all produced in her bones. I am sorry but we will have to start you on Chemo as soon as possible." 

By that time my mom and I are bawling our eyes out. I heard a beep come from my phone and read a text from Asa. 

I am so glad that I have you in my life. <3

I threw my phone beside me and thought "Not for long."