Red vs. Blue Oneshots

Church x Blue! Reader

"I'm fucking done with this goddamn shit."

That was the last thing that Church had said before storming off to his room. You glared at Tucker and Caboose, who were each holding half of a broken chair. For some reason, 'sitting' in chairs makes them break nowadays.

Throughout the day, Church had so far dealt with Doc whining about how unsanitary that the base is, the Reds trying to make negotiations with the Blues so that they could have the tank, he was woken from his catnap of ten minutes due to Caboose nailing himself in the foot with a bullet(again), and now had Tucker and Caboose together to sort out.

"Talk about screwing m up," you snarled. They stepped back, resulting in Caboose tripping and falling square on Tucker.

"Hey," Tucker called out. "You should try talking to him. He listens to you. More than us, at least." You hummed in thought. It HAD been the first sensible thing that Tucker had said while being in the canyon(a LONG goddamn time).

Sighing, you picked up your small but precious bag of Swedish Fish and made your way to Church's room.

"Church?" You asked, raping gently on the door to his room, a metallic echo ringing across the small hallway. "Can I come in?" The question seemed to linger on his side momentarily.

"No," he hissed back through the door in reply. Shrugging it off, you picked the lock(which was rather easy), opened the door, and sat next to him on the rickety on beds they provided us to sleep in. No wonder Flowers insisted in sleeping standing up, you thought.

"I thought I just told you not to come in!" He snarked. "What the fuck do you not get about that?" Well someone was clearly having a rough day.

"Well sheesh, chill. I just wanted to give you these," you stated, putting the bagged fish-shaped sweets in his lap. "But clearly you don't want them, so I'll be taking my leave now."

A hand caught your wrist when you moved to get up. "Thank you," Church said, trying to be nice. A small smile graced his face, a rather rare sight for anyone in the canyon.

He pulled you back towards him and sat you down in his lap. This sudden and random action caused a burst of red to bloom onto your blushing face, putting even the reddest of roses and ripest of tomatoes to horrible shame.

"Ch-Church? Are you alright?" You questioned your leader, conserved by his movements. Maybe he had spent too much time with Tucker yesterday.

"No," he mumbled into your ear, his breath tickling your bare neck. "Stay here, with me." Church rested his head on your shoulder and pulled your body flush against yours, making another round of blush to turn around and go to your face.

Even though he was calm(er), you could still hear the train of annoyed thoughts towards his teammates racing through his head.

"Hey," you whispered, turning your head towards his.

"Hmm?" He hummed in response.

"Calm down, dear lord I can practically hear you thoughts!" You whined playfully.

"B-"

"No."

"T-"

"No means no Church."

"Say the woman who didn't understand what 'stay out' means."

"Would you rather I leave?"

"No!" Church squeezed, pulling you closer to him. "Mine. Stay."

Chuckling softly, you turned to face him and looked straight into the center of his blue orbs, which were overflowing with different, conflicting emotions.

So lost in thought, you hadn't realized that Church had crashed his lips into yours. When you did realize, you were much too shocked to react. You could feel his frown in the kiss, and then a disappointed smile.

"Look, I'm sorry, you can leave, of course y-" You cut his dejected ramblings off by grabbing the collar of his shirt and pulling him into a rough kiss.

"What have you done to the snarky (Y/n), you imposter?" Church asked playfully. "Because I like this new (Y/n), so keep her locked up as long as you w-"

And with that, you slapped him across the face.

"Okay okay okay!" He Church squeaked out. "No more jokes, no more jokes, point made."

You nodded your head and dragged him back to his bed and sat down next to him.

"Wanna put a movie in?" You asked.

"But what about Tucker and Caboose and the Reds?" He inquired worriedly. As much as he hated to admit it, he genuinely cares about his teammates and soldiers.

"They'll either sort it out or kill each other eventually."

He stopped to ponder that for a moment. "Good point, what do you wanna watch?"