Alone All Along

Confused Love

I woke up the next morning and smiled, looking at Jeremy cuddled up next to me. For some reason it felt perfect. His phone was buzzing off the hook. I took it upon myself to look over at it. someone named Tank was calling him. And there was a message from some girl named Ava. 

//I can't wait for you to get back baby. I miss you so much!//

"Jeremy, wake up. Tank keeps calling you." I said. He stirred a bit and opened his eyes. He smiled at me and kissed me. "Answer your phone." I laughed. He sat up, grabbed his phone and answered the call. 

"Hello? Oh, yea. Today is fine. Yea, you'll get to meet her. Nah, bro, she's cool. Yea. Alright. See you in a bit. Bye" He said. 

"Who was that? And are you guys talking about me?" I asked. He just laughed.

"Take a shower or whatever. We're meeting up with a friend of mine." he said. I got up and walked to the shower. He followed me. I smiled at the fact he was about to shower with me. "Is this okay?" he asked. I nodded and we got in. We washed up and laughed and made jokes. Then, we got out and got dressed. 

"Who is this guy?" I asked. 

"Don't worry about it. He's a friend I made a few months ago. He's cool I promise." he said. I sighed and we walked out the door. We got to the car and he sat there on his phone. I began to get aggravated like he was keeping something from me. Who the fuck was Ava?

He finally put his phone down and we drove off. "I don't know if I want to go today. This feels weird." I said. He looked at me. 

"What? It's okay for me to meet your piece of shit friends, but you cant meet my friends?" he asked. That kind of hurt me a bit. 

"Okay, I didn't know they were like that. Don't put that on me." I said. He laughed. 

"I'm messing with you, babe. Lighten up. Tank is a nice guy. I promise and he cant wait to meet you. That's a plus." he said.

We pulled up to a coffee shop. Weird. "What? He likes coffee." he said. I shook my head and smiled. We walked in and a guy walked over to Jeremy. 

"Good to see you again, brother." he said. He was... country. What the fuck was Jeremy doing these days? He never hung out with people like this. 

"Tank, this is Cayla. Cayla, this is Tank. My buddy." he said. I shook his hand. This guy must be a really good guy, because him and Jeremy are complete opposites. We ordered our coffee and sat down at a table. 

"So, Miss Cayla. Tell me bout yourself." Tank said. 

"Uhh... not much to tell." I said. Jeremy shot me a look. 

"She's lying. Her life is full of stuff to tell." he said. 

"Well, tell me about it." he said. I sighed. 

"Well, I'm Cayla obviously. My life really started when I met Jeremy. I lived here in Vegas. I had a few other friends and got into some bad shit. Making money by steeling it. Robbing people just to buy drugs. My best friend killed himself and that's when I moved to L.A. That's where everything changed. I started dating a YouTube star and there was no more drugs or even occasional drinking. It was all off limits there. I hated him but got engaged to him anyways. That's when I reconnected with Jeremy and here we are." i said. Everyone sat there silently. 

"Well then. That's a story." he said. 

"It's not a story. That's my life." I said. 

"He was joking, Cay." Jeremy said. I sat there silently for the rest of the time they talked. I stared down at my phone, texting Diego. 

D: How's Vegas?

Me: Just met one of Jeremy's friends and I feel awkward as hell. 

D: Don't be rude. Get to know the dude. Unless.. is it a girl?

Me: No, its a guy. I just don't know really what to talk about anymore. 

D: Just get through it and we will do something when you get back. 

Me: Alright. 

"You ever get off that thing?" Jeremy asked. Him and Tank laughed. 

"Yea, I was texting Diego." I said. 

"Uh-oh. Who's Diego?" Tank asked. 

"Nobody." I said. We finished our shit and left. I wasn't in the mood to do anything anymore. I wanted to go home. 

"Hey, how about you guys go out and do your thing? I'm going to go back to the hotel and chill. Not feeling very well." I said. Jeremy pulled me aside. 

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked. 

"Nothing. I told you i'm not feeling good." I said. 

"No, is this about last night? You wanted that just as much as i-"

"No Jeremy. It isn't. Okay? Go have fun and when you get back to wherever you fucking live just go fuck Av.. Never mind. Give me the keys." I said. I ripped them out of his hands and walked to the car. Once I was inside, I watched as the guys got into Tank's car and sped off. A few tears fell down my face. I pulled out my phone. 

Me: Can you come to Vegas? 

D: Are you okay?

Me: I don't know and your'e the only one I can trust anymore. 

D: Yea. It's going to take me a few hours to get there is that okay?

Me: Yes, just come as soon as possible 

I went back to the hotel, sat and waited. I fell asleep and had that dream. That same dream I used to have ALL the time after Luke died.

*Dream*
I walked in his bathroom and saw him laying there in the tub all fucked up. "LUKE. GET UP!" I screamed. He looked up at me, pale as hell.

"YOU DID THIS!!! GOOOOOOOOO!" he yelled, over and over again. I backed up and slid against the wall to the floor. "HELP MEEEE. IT BURNS!! IT BURNS!!!!!" he screamed. Someone busted through the door with a black ski mask on their face. They shot him dead in his head and then looked down at me.

"WHY DID YOU DO THAT???" I yelled.

He put the gun to my forehead and said "this is your fault" and shot me.

*end of dream*

I woke up to knocking on the hotel door. I got up, not remembering Diego was suppose to be coming. I opened the door slowly... "yes?" I asked frustrated thinking it was just a fan who found us.

"Well didn't you ask me to come?" I heard. I looked up and saw Diego and hugged him so tight before I started to cry. "Hey hey.. shhhh" he said.. scooting me in the room and shutting the door.  "I'm here now. tell me what's going on."

We sat on the bed and I explained everything. He had a look of sadness in his eyes. "Diego I'm sorry.. me and you.. I just feel.."

"I know.  Jeremy is the new Grayson and I'm the new Jeremy" He said.. laughing?

"What? no that's not at all-"

"Sorry.. worded that wrong. Jeremy is the new boyfriend.  I'm the new best friend. I get it haha. I'm fine with it. I just don't wanna lose u completely."