Mafia Betrayal

Chapter Five

Charlotte

"Let me get this straight. You told him you still loved him, went back to his hotel room, and then left him there naked?" Jenni stifled a laugh as we sat in my mother's living room recounting the last few hours.

I grimaced. Hearing it out loud was worse than it was in my mind. "I didn't know what else to do, Jenni! He saw my c-section scar, he was bound to start asking questions!"

"It didn't occur to you to say it was from something else?" She she asked, shifting her weight on the couch.

"I couldn't think! Everything happened so fast, and I didn't want to lie."

Jenni rolled her eyes at me dramatically. "Oh, you mean like you've been doing for the last four years?"

I sucked into sharp breath, knowing she was right. "That's not fair. I tried..." I started to defend. We both knew she was right. I did try, but not hard enough.

"Do you really still love him?" She asked curiously. Luca was a topic that Jenni and I tended to avoid because we didn't see eye to eye. She was never his biggest fan, and time and space didn't  change that.

"I do." I pressed my lips together, feeling the heaviness of my admission. I did still love him, but that didn't change anything. "I miss him everyday, Jenni. I miss his voice. His smell. I miss the way he looks at me. Even tonight, after all this time, he looks at me like I hung the moon and he'd do anything for me."

"Anything except leave the Mafia. Which is the entire reason we're in this situation to begin with." Jenni quipped. "Look, I can't believe I'm actually saying this, but if you really feel that way, you need to talk to him. He deserves to know about Layla and the real reason you left. If you're so sure it can't work out, then let him prove you right."

"He's going to hate me." I rubbed my temples feeling a migraine coming on.

"You did what you did to keep his daughter safe, Charlotte. You had the best of intentions, and he gave you every reason in the world to be worried about raising your daughter in the Mafia. All you wanted was to keep her safe, and no one can fault you for that. Not to mention, you contacted him and his troll of a boss intercepted it and paid you off. And if you remember right, he told you that Luca would have done the same thing because he couldn't have children around."

Jenni was brutally honest, and sometimes that was exactly what I needed. She was right. I was protecting Layla as best I could in the moment, and I would protect her that way for her entire life.

Layla was so interested in the idea of her father after seeing all of her friends' families, and her questions killed me. Our family would never be that. It would never be as cookie cutter as her friends, and what if she was disappointed with that? What if he rejected her? What if he broke her heart? He had an opportunity to put us first, and he didn't. Maybe Antonio was right and he really didn't want her. Maybe it was selfish to spring her on him like this. Was he better off with us out of his life?

And what if they came after her? What if his enemies hunted her down the way they did to me? What if Silvano came after her? But what if that happened when I was on my own? With Antonio in jail, how much protection did we really have?

I could spend the rest of my life beating myself up over this decision, but every option I saw felt equally as daunting. Telling Luca. Not telling Luca. There was so much ambiguity on either side.

"I didn't leave because I didn't love him, Jenni. I left because I don't want to come second to him. I can't compete with the Mafia my entire life, and Layla shouldn't have to either. He's not willing to compromise, and honestly, I can't afford to either. I could lose her, Jenni. What if Luca wants to take her from me?" Tears pooled in my eyes just saying it out loud.