i love him so much
listen to thinking bout you by ariana grande on repeat!!!!
i haven't edited this but i really wanted to update so if you see something wrong you can comment or just skip it 😤
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ethan happily drove down the road you lived on, so happy you invited him over. he hadn't been to your house in what felt like forever, but was actually only a week. you had become very distant with your boyfriend, and he didn't know why.
ethan's guilty pleasure, nicki minaj, played through his bmw. he tapped his finger on the steering wheel, so eager to see you. when he saw your house come into view, a smile immediately formed on his face. he saw you sitting on your porch, arms crossed and hair a mess.
you stood up from the porch, still having your arms crossed. ethan got out of his car, humming the lyrics to the song he was just listening to while a closed mouth smile was on his face.
upon getting in closer distance to you, ethan noticed your eyes were swollen and bloodshot while the surrounding areas were red and puffy. his smile quickly faded, wondering what caused you to be upset.
"baby what's wrong?" ethan jogged up the driveway and ended up standing right in front of you, cupping your cheeks in his soft but cold hands. you refused to look him in the eye, so nervous and heartbroken for what you were about to tell him.
"can we sit down?" your voice came out barely above a whisper, and had a raspiness from the previous crying you were doing.
"y-yeah." ethan dropped his hands from your face down to your wrists, leading you inside to your house. you pulled them back gently, giving a sign you didn't want to go inside.
ethan looked at you, wondering why you didn't want to go inside. "c'mon, it's about to rain." he softly tugged your wrist again, holding the door open.
you finally looked him in the eyes for the first time since he arrived. tears brimmed your lower lash line, threatening to spill over. you begged him with your eyes to close the door and sit down. "please." you pleaded.
he waited a couple seconds, staring into your eyes. "okay." he sat down on the top step, waiting for you to tell him what was wrong.
you quietly sat down beside him, wiping the tears from your eyes. ethan stared down at his hands, that played with his keys.
there was a long moment of pure silence, and you contemplated telling him the devastating news, or just telling him some made up story.
you didn't want to hurt him, that's the last thing you wanted to do. but you had to tell him the truth, even if that's what hurt him the most.
"i'm breaking up with you." you blurted it out, immediately covering your mouth afterwards, not believing what you had to say.
"what?" ethan turned his head to you, the girl he was in love with. his face was drained of color, his eyes were overcome with a sad hue.
your eyes squeezed shut, tears escaping over the sides. you tried not to make a noise, not wanting to full on sob in front of ethan.
"why? do you not love me anymore?" ethans voice cracked at the end, a tear trickling down his right cheek. he fully turned his body towards you, grabbing both of your hands and holding them in his.
"no! i love you more than anything else in this world, which is why i have to do this." ethan abruptly turned his head away from you, letting go of your hands and looking out onto the grass.
"my mom lost her job. we have to move to fucking washington. what the fuck is in washington?" you raise your hands in anger.
"we can do long distance, we can make it work," ethan licked his lips that were covered in his salty tears. "please. i love you so much, i can't live without you."
"i can't, ethan. we both know it won't work." before you could say anything else ethan kissed you. he pressed his soft lips against yours, making sure it was the most passionate and meaning full kiss he would ever give you. he pulled away, pulling you towards him and wrapping his arms around your frame.
you wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing the side of his head. you felt his body heave up and down, while you felt warm tears land on your shoulder. silent sobs left his lips, and you continued to hold him, repeatedly kissing his face.
"i-i love you so much y/n y/m/n y/l/n, a-and i know that w-we will be together again someday." you hugged his body tighter, before letting him go.
"no. you can't wait for me, that's the last thing i want." you knew that you and ethan would talk everyday. but eventually everyday would turn into every week, and every month, and eventually never.
"you are going to go to college and study astrology. you are going to graduate and work at nasa, where one day you will go to space, just like you've always wanted. you will meet a new girl, and start a family. and i promise, i will be there for your wedding.
"i love you, ethan."
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bitch i'm fucking sad
