Impregnable {A Walking Dead Fanfiction}

Sixteen

    Shane pulled his pistol out of its holster and sprinted towards the sound while I grabbed Mable and ran towards the Winnebago. "WALKER!" The lady screamed in the distance. The door of the Winnebago flew open and Rick sprinted out with a rifle. I grabbed the door as it swung shut and found Lori standing at the entrance, Carl hiding behind her. "What's happening?" Lori asked as I pushed them back and shut the door. "I'm not sure." I lied, looking out the window. There's no point in scaring the kids. I walked into the back to try and get a better view, looking in the direction they'd run. Nothing. Long, agonizing minutes passed, it was impossible to hear what was happening. Finally, Daryl emerged from the outcropping with something swung over his shoulder. "We're good!" He called out, his voice far away and muffled. "What happened?" I asked, running out to him. "Go out there and see for yourself," He said walking past me, holding out a long piece of string with a dozen or so dead squirrels tied to it. "MERLE! Get your ugly ass over here we got some squirrel!" I continued into the outcropping, just a few feet away from the edge of camp. A decapitated walker was crouched over a deer, a small pool of blood forming around them. Shane, Rick, Jim, Dale, Andrea, and Amy all stood around looking shell-shocked. "I've never seen one make it this far up the mountain," Dale said cautiously. "I guess they're running out of food in the cities," Jim said.

    Later in the day, Jacqui cooked some kind of brown soup with vegetables and squirrel. We all sat in a circle and silently ate. I couldn't stop thinking about how things were going in Ellijay. What if they never came back, what if more walkers came? No one had seen Carol, Sophia, or Ed all day. A few of us discussed going to their tent and checking on them but decided it was better to give them space for now. A group of people chopped up the walker and deer carcasses, throwing them in the back of a truck to take them far away from the mountain. I laid down with Mable and read her a book about dinosaurs until she was fast asleep. I laid down next to her, hoping things would be better when we woke.

    I woke up to Mable snoring loudly next to me, her face illuminated by the moonlight. I sat up and saw the keys to the Wrangler sitting on top of a note on the center console. I picked it up and read the messy handwriting.

"Meet me in the trees behind the fire. I need to tell you something.

-S"

    I checked on Mable before quietly exiting the Wrangler, locking it behind me. The air was crisp and cold as I walked through the empty camp, wondering what he wanted. I saw him in the firelight, sitting on a fallen tree where the woods met the camp. "What did you want to tell me?" I asked, sitting next to him. He fidgeted anxiously before responding. "I slept with Lori while you were in Ellijay." He said, staring at the dirt. "What?" I asked, standing and facing him. "Why would you tell me that?" I said, frustrated at the lump that was starting to form in my throat. "I'm so sorry." He said, not answering my question. "Does Rick know?" I asked, covering my face with my hands. He shook his head, still staring at the ground. "I didn't think you were coming back. I was angry at you for not trusting me. I was selfish." "Angry at me?" I scoffed. "Yes. I felt like God placed us in each other's lives just to laugh in my face and rip you away." I heard his voice break. "I just wanted to feel something. No...there's no excuse. I'm sorry." He looked up at me with tears in his eyes, I felt torn. "You said there was nothing between you two," I said, looking away. "Hollie...there wasn't, not like that. Not on my end at least. I've felt disgusted with myself ever since. When y'all drove up the mountain and Rick stepped out I realized how much of a monster I really am. I...I went to Harrison Memorial the day shit hit the fan. He was in a coma, I tried to carry him but... It was him or me. I ran like a coward." He dropped his head, sobbing for a moment before taking in a deep, shaky breath. "The night after you left I had this gut feeling you were never coming home. That I'd never get to know the real you." I didn't know why I was standing here, hearing him out. "Then why Lori? If that's how you really feel." I said between my fingers. He shook his head, "I don't know what I was thinking." "Why?" I repeated, my voice breaking. Shane stood, taking a step towards me. "Because I was a bitter, inconsiderate asshole who made a mistake. I don't expect you to forgive me, I just couldn't keep looking you in the eye until I told you the truth." We stared at each other intently for a moment before I walked forward, wrapping my arms around him.

    Shane stumbled backward before hugging me tight. "What are you doing, you should be so angry at me." He said, crying. "I am," I replied. "You're the first smile I see every morning. You are my sunlight, my reason to carry on through this hell," He said. Tears flowed, blurring my vision. In a swirl of messy emotions, I reached around his neck and pulled him towards me, kissing him. I pulled his body into mine before he pulled away suddenly, looking at me with shock. "What are you doing?" He gasped. "I...don't know," I said, beginning to cry again. I walked past him, sitting on the fallen tree and putting my face in my hands. Shane sat down and wrapped his arm around me as I wept. "I guess I just wanted to feel something," I said after a while. He let out a long, sharp exhale, shaking his head. "I feel like I ruined something beautiful." My thoughts screamed at me to be angry at him, to call him an asshole and leave. How did he speak to Lori when I'm not around? Was she the only one? I felt sick to my stomach. "I don't think so. I just need to know I can trust you." I said, he nodded, hugging me tight.