The Shadows Of Lucidum

A deadly hunt

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My stomach growled. I had actually forgotten to eat. But...wait....why did I even feel all of this in the first place? Wasn't I just remembering all of it? Could one really dive deep enough into their memories in order for them to literally feel, what they experienced? The human mind could be confusing and make one feel things it never actually felt, but was hunger really something my head could reenact? I knew there were ways to deliberately make yourself feel something... Things like imagining the pain someone felt and thinking you'd feel it, too. Forcing yourself to forget feelings... forcing yourself to have feelings. All of it was possible, but... Would my head really go that far? Something about this felt wrong, it felt unlikely, inexplicable.

Climbing up a tree was a lot easier than climbing it down again. It took an eternity for me to find my way down the tree, down at least 20 metres. Why did I even climb this high? Why didn't I have a rope or something else, that would have made it a lot easier for me. Why couldn't I just jump down without breaking every single bone in my body and tearing apart organs. In short....arrive on the ground alive?

I finally arrived on the ground and the first thing I did, was to lie down on it, appreciating the safety it meant. My eyes gazed upon the morning sky. It couldn't have been long since the sun had risen, as there still were hints of red spread across it. The birds were chirping, wasting their breath trying to make the world seem better than it was. Their lives were easy, full of joy. They didn't have to worry about things, us humans had to. They didn't know war...it seemed, that in some ways, they were a lot smarter than we were. For it needed a lot of stupidity to start a war and even more to start another one after having already lost more than once. Why couldn't humanity just use their faults to learn from them, not repeat them, expecting a different outcome, despite doing the exact same things our ancestors had done? Noone could understand humanity...not even humans themselves.

Our minds were but an inexplicable clutter, filled with peculiar thoughts and controlled by unfathomable feelings.

A filbert shrub caught my attention. Filberts weren't exactly known for being satiating, but they were better than eating nothing and I didn't want my growling stomach to scare away my prey. Plus, they   tasted better than the berries I had eaten two days ago. A lot... I ate a few and stuffed some more of them into the pockets of my dress. Who knew how long I'd be stuck in this forest? And I could use them as bait for animals.

So off I went, searching for a good hunting ground. There were some along the river, but I didn't want to risk being seen again. Therefore, I went the exact opposite direction...deeper into the forest.

There it was again. The feeling of being watched. Although this time it didn't feel unpleasant, not sinister, not menacing, but rather protecting. I tried to search for it's source, but there was noone... nothing at all. Just the forest's infinite number of trees and flowers. I couldn't even spot a single animal. No insects. No birds in the sky. No sound but the rustling of the trees.

Feeling a little reassured, I kept walking. After some time, I managed to ignore it, but I knew something or someone was still watching me from out of my sight. Out of my reach. Lingering in the darkness the treetops created. The deeper I got into the forest, the harder it got to tell which time it might have been. There only were a handful of rays of light making it through the dense leaves above me. It was barely enough for me, making it hard to see where I had to go.

Something moved.

I saw it in the corner of my eye and didn't dare move even a single inch. I listened for any sounds it might have made, trying to find out in which direction it ran off to. Crack! The sound of someone stepping on a dead branch. Whatever it was, it was close. Probably about 100 metres away....Crack! It was coming closer. 80 metres. To my left. I slowly drew my bow and turned around. 50 metres. I let go of the arrow and....it grazed the animal's shoulder.

The arrow had missed.

As the now exasperated animal prepared for another attack, I took another arrow. This time I told myself to wait longer. Wait until I could properly see it and aim at it's heart. If I missed again, it could get dangerous. As long as I didn't know what it was, I couldn't properly react. The animal drew closer and I could see it's vague form. It was taller than me. A lot taller. I started to hear it's footsteps. Any second now. I took a last breath and prepared to aim. My heart was racing. If this didn't work...It was within reach. I had never seen an animal alike, but it's heart had to be at the same position, the other animal's hearts were at. Now or never. I aimed and the arrow landed right were I wanted it to. The animal staggered, but kept coming into my direction, prepared to attack.

Even if it would have been the last thing it'd ever do.

I let my bow fall to the ground and took my knife. A scar more didn't matter to me, as long as I'd be able to keep my life. I wasn't someone to run, once it got dangerous. I always went all in and I definitely wouldn't let this be my last time. I started charging at it, my knife aimed at where the arrow had landed. Once I would have gotten under the animal's chest, it couldn't see me anymore. Let alone defend itself. One last deep breath to calm down at least a little bit and I let myself fall down to the ground, hoping it would notice too late and either stop right above me or keep running. As soon as the bleeding spot on it's chest was within reach, I took the opportunity. This time it had to go deeper, so I pushed with all my strenght, until I could only see the holster. The animal kept running, but there was no way I'd let go. No way I'd lose the last thing protecting me.

No way I'd be willing to lose my life.

It dragged me along for a few metres. Then, it finally fell onto the ground, fell onto me. I squeezed myself out from under it and straightened my back. That thing sure had been heavy, which made me think about how I'd get it into the village. Dragging it there on my own sure would have been quite exhausting, but I didn't really have another choice, now did I? If I had run back and got someone to help me, some other animals would have preyed on it and the meat would have been rotten within only a few hours. I wasn't going to just leave it behind either. I had risked my life - which actually wasn't that out of the ordinary, but still - for it and I didn't want to give up, what I deserved.

First things first, I turned it around as much as I could and got my knife back. Then, I ate some more of the filberts I had put into my pocket that morning because I was hungry again.

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