released ± [ luke hemmings ]

± f i v e

±

I hadn't slept well that night at all.

I had felt myself tossing and turning continuously, moving in and out of consciousness as though sleeping just didn't agree with me. I mean, it usually did.

Sleeping used to be my only escape.

I mean, think about it. 8 hours of dreaming what you want to dream. You can control it, if you want to.

No real world, no stress, just... well, dreaming.

I loved it, which is why I normally used to sleep really easily. My head would hit the pillow and I would be out. But that night, I just couldn't do anything.

No matter what position I was in, nothing was comfortable. Nothing could prevent my mind from wandering to the fact that the next day, I would have to be working with that boy again, and how annoying he would be.

I just hated the way that he had so much control over me, and he didn't even know it.

Or maybe he did, I don't know what's running through that stupid boys head. But I'm pretty sure he was purposely annoying, as much as he denies it.

It's like he's out to get me or something. It's inevitable and highly distracting. And if he was going to constantly be depriving me from my well-needed sleep, then I was afraid that I would be forced into quitting my beloved job at the café.

I think it was a little after 4:30am when I finally managed to drift away. Not that it really helped, as I woke up unintentionally just a few hours later at 7, where I couldn't get back to sleep again.

And, I don't know about you, but I find that it's always harder waking up after having little sleep that it is to just pull an all-nighter. So much so that it would probably have be better to just stay up all night. At least, then, you don't have to actually go through the struggle of attempting to wake yourself back up again.

At 7:30am, I decided that there was no way I was going to get to sleep again, and since my shift at the café started at 10:30, I just got up and went downstairs.

On sundays, my parents would usually stay asleep until around 11, so hopefully, if I was quick and quiet enough, I would be able to grab some breakfast and quickly run back up to my room without having any unfortunate interruptions.

My life pretty much revolved about keeping as far away from them as possible.

I went to the kitchen, immediately heading for the bread and taking out a couple of slices, popping them in the toaster.

I grabbed a jar of peanut butter and opened the lid, dipping my finger in. Nothing, and I mean nothing, could beat peanut butter. It was just the best, there was no competition.

After spreading peanut butter on my toast, I quickly grabbed the plate and scurried back up to my room.

I hadn't heard a stir from my parents room yet, and I didn't exactly feel like waiting around for that to change.

It was nearly 9am, my toast was long gone and I had already had a shower and got ready for work.

Funnily enough, with a great lack of sleep from the previous night, I was still feeling wide awake.

But, I had run out of things to do, and was getting more bored by the second, so I decided to go to work early.

I'm not normally the kind of person to do this willingly, especially as I wouldn't get paid for extra or anything, but I desperately needed something to clear my mind.