So Many Agoes

Chapter 6

June 1967

The season of restlessness and anticipation as we waited for the school year to end, had fallen upon us. Our last week of school had come as quickly as the first had and I was more than excited.

Emilienne and I finally had the time for our first formal date ever, which was approaching on the following Friday evening and if my constant need to fidget or squirm in my chair during school wasn't already a dead give away, I was ecstatic.

The hours ticked away, each one felt like a full day. Minutes felt like hours, seconds like minutes. Getting me to pay attention at all was a feat, let alone for an entire class or test.

The day finally arrived and I burst out of school as fast as possible, parting from my friends in a matter of minutes. Emilienne said she had a surprise for me, she wanted to show me something. The excited tension in me was building by the second and my jitters were getting the best of me. I took a shower, made sure I was squeaky clean and tried on four or five different shirts and ties. My heart was threatening to burst out of my chest despite the fact that I already knew Emilienne quite well.

I had gotten ready much too quickly in my excited stupor and created a time gap. I now had three hours to kill which consisted of my pacing back and forth amongst the rooms of the house and dramatically flopping onto my bed.

The three hours crept by slowly but ended nonetheless, and it came time for me to pick up Emilienne. I happily cantered over to her house and knocked on the door. It swung open with an ear splitting squeak that caused both Emilienne and I to wince. However my pain was temporary as I noticed Emilienne. As per usual, she was gorgeous but each time I saw her, it was like a different side of her came out to greet me. It inspired me to make the acquaintance of all of them, all of her sides, good, mysterious, happy, somber, angry, passionate and many many more.

Tonight she wore a floral short sleeved shirt and black pants that flared out at the ankle, a unique style for that time period. In the dusk light, her skin almost looked blue and shone like a light itself.

Snapping myself out of such a trance that she seemed to always put me in was difficult, until her voice brought my attention to her personality as well. She wore a mysterious aura tonight, she could have lead me to California that night and I would have followed without hesitation.

She lead me down the street, looking confident as ever. If she had any nerves, she certainly didn't show it. She lead us into the backyard of someone else's house in uptown Milcreek, then into a basement and the scene in front of me opened me up to a whole new world, a whole new culture, one that I had been lured to since I first saw Emilienne. In comparison, this basement looked much like the modern Hairspray movie that my 8 and 10 year old granddaughters watch nonstop. There were couples dancing in every nook and cranny of the room, My Girl by the Temptations was fluidly strung out of a record player.

"Well? What are you waiting for? Let's dance!"

I snapped out of my torpor, quite suddenly while Emilienne pulled me to the floor and away from the doorway. I placed my hands on her waist and she wrapped an arm around my neck, it was still just as comfortable and natural as New Years, only we had an odd understanding of one another - a mutual knowledge of what our relationship brought to the table. This knowledge put us in a bubble together, void of the outside world where most didn't understand this connection. They saw us as a nuisance, we saw it as a lifeline.

Emilienne and I danced for hours, fast paced, slow paced whatever pace you want to name, we probably danced it. Conversation was light and minimal, our communication wasn't in need of spoken language. We addressed each other merely through movements and our unbreakable eye contact. Our bodies meshed together in ways that could only be described as sinful, but I couldn't let go of her.

"I didn't know dancing came so naturally to you" Emilienne remarked

"I didn't either."

A smile crept across her features and it put a grin on my face as well. Seeing her carefree and happy but also very aware of herself was something I hadn't ever seen. In that moment she knew exactly who she was, where she came from and was absolutely okay with it and I felt something strong swelling up in my chest. I figured out in a matter of seconds that if I didn't spend my life with Emilienne Marie Fontenot, a very miserable one I would lead.

The fact that someone could have such a power over me made me want to hide under my bed, however that would take me away from Emilienne and I felt suffocated at the thought of not having her in my life. I made the decision right there while we danced to the thirtieth or so song, that I was going to grab onto Emilienne and hold tight, no matter the wild ride our relationship would take me on. I was ready for the challenge.

Later that evening, Emilienne and I went to Jimmy's for a quick dinner. Our first official date was beyond successful. As we laughed and joked around in that diner that Friday night, finally free from the heavy chains of school for two and a half months, I learned something new. In that time period, I seemed to learn new things quite a bit.; Emilienne was a great teacher.

Most of my life had, until this point been mundane and passionless. There is nothing wrong with mundane, that's a part of life. However meeting Emilienne awakened a passion, a fire in me I had never seen or felt before.

She taught me about microaggressions, and her culture and to stop considering her exotic because she's not a fruit or a newly discovered animal, she is a black woman. She taught me that I needed to make reforms to the way I saw the world, and how I expressed what I saw, to avoid the kind of dehumanizing language I was so used to using.

A sudden feeling of empowerment had washed over me - a desperate need to fight for Emilienne's heart was clawing and scrabbling at my heart, throat and chest like how a cat climbs up a tree. The way Emilienne was introducing new things to me and teaching me new things whether intentionally or not, was pulling me to her culture, her life and a new perspective.

Emilienne was changing me. She was making me into the best version of myself I could be and I was ready to take on the new passions, hardships and victories as long as Emilienne was there to guide me through this foreign territory. I was ready to do life, no matter what was thrown at me. I was ready for this newfound passion and longing for learning to be tested and bent in every direction; And boy. Was it ever.