So Many Agoes

Chapter 26

October 1971

Emilienne and I stayed in Milcreek the entire summer, helping Thomas adjust to his new mobility. My parents had to make drastic adjustments to the house, a ramp to the front door, build a bedroom downstairs, include handrails and seats in the bathroom and showers. It was all a long grueling process.

Thomas was ecstatic to be home, but all the same, he wanted to be outside more than anything. He practically became a third parent to Denise, happily taking her to the park with him to watch the world go by.

Emilienne and I greatly appreciated the change in scenery from busy New York that always kept one on their toes. We got to catch up with Francis and Eddie, whom we hadn't seen in years. The four of us piled into a booth at Jimmy's which we hadn't done since graduating high school, it was a wonderfully nostalgic feeling.

Francis was doing well in school and had decided to pursue law school to sate his need for justice. Eddie had ended up going to trade school to learn glass blowing, his artistic pieces had already shown up in some well accredited places around the eastern coast of the US.

The two of them were shocked to see Emilienne and I still together, and even more surprised to see Denise babbling in my arms. The four of us talked about high school and all the trials and tribulations we had faced, the subject of Roger crossing our minds. No one had heard from him since about a week after graduating high school. He took off quickly, and did not disclose where he was headed.

Eventually, it was time for Emilienne and I to head back to New York. We both had a hard time leaving family, Emilienne was devastated at having to leave her siblings again. The both of our families gathered at Alexander park to say their goodbyes to us and watch us drive off.

When we made it back to New York, we solemnly unpacked, and prepared for the school year. Both of us coming down from the high of being around the people we loved most. We didn't get much sleep the first few nights, even our typically happy Issie would fuss and cry when she wanted to be held by Thomas who was then 300 miles away.

School started in a timely fashion and we fell back into our typical routine, sometimes meeting in the center of campus to pass Denise back and forth based on our schedules. It was mundane, and simple, and difficult to keep going. The two of us had to motivate each other to do so much as get up in the morning. There were lots of long morning hugs and deep sighs to sate our restlessness and exhaustion. Many nights where we went to sleep as soon as Denise did, many weekends where we didn't get out of bed and just held each other, or slept.

This was supposed to be our most difficult school year, seniors, only 8 short months away from hanging degrees on our walls. I had ended up taking Psychology and History, my eventual goal was to teach other white people about the privilege they had and foster an environment where people like me could learn how to love and support people of color.

Emilienne was interested in being active, changing the way the future generations thought. She was close to obtaining a Social Science degree with a Linguistics minor, she was gearing up to work in activism, and improve work environments for people of color and the LGBTQ community.

Thankfully that funk came to a slow, but definite end, and we found our joy again. As fall rolled around, both of our moods improved, as any sane person would, we loved fall. We happily started cooking roasts, and greens and we even took some time to carve pumpkins, letting Denise eagerly dig her little hands into the seeds and stringy pumpkin guts.

I came home from school one cool October afternoon after a particularly mentally straining day, full of thoughts of Thomas, to Emilienne cooking up a storm. She presented me with pumpkin pie, candied yams, greens, a nice roast and cake. It was only then that it dawned on me that it was my 22nd birthday.

My mind was entirely too preoccupied with the burdens of life to even remember and Emilienne was aware of this, which is why she had skipped school with the excuse of being sick, to cook all day. She had gotten a friend from her old internship that she stayed in touch with to watch Denise, so it was just the two of us (this friend was one of the many that quit the day Emilienne was fired, and was someone who we trusted to watch Issie). It was a breath of fresh air, getting to stop for a minute to relax and contemplate.

She greeted me with a long kiss, that only told me she had more than just eating food planned for that night. We enjoyed a candle lit dinner, where she gifted me with a watch, a favorite book of mine that had been destroyed when our apartment was vandalized (it was a rare book to come across which is why it took over a year to find a copy) and the final present was herself, her own stunning body decorated in lingerie. We had maybe too much fun that night, and even tried a few new things that had become popular with the beginning of the 70's.

I will forever look at Emilienne as a goddess, a person of power who has divine capability gifted to her by her ancestors. Such a thought was proven when we were recently informed of the "Eve gene" a gene that only black women carry, that has the possibility to create every single physical appearance on earth. I didn't have to be told though, Emilienne has always held a power, a connection to something spiritual, a way to change the course of history with the single bat of her fanned out eyelashes.

The fact that she chose to love me, will forever astound me, but I will forever be grateful for her seeing past my white ignorance and noticing that a good heart that needed a little perspective was all I was.

Despite it being my birthday, my only hope was to give back to her, was to love her and show her how good of a person I could be, for her, for Denise and for the world to see.