an epic saga

somebody once told me the world was gonna kill me

a.n.// i am kind of sorry about the end of this. it was like,, 3am?? 4am?? 2?? time is a human construct and not definite so who the fuck knows but this was borne in a tyme of gr8 beanage and deliriousness. that is the only explanation i will openly offer for the complete shitness of this.

2.4k words strap in lads.

- - -

Louise marched upon the fortress in the mountains, prepared to at least break a nail in her effort to overthrow Ecillana, the wicked assistant manager of the kingdom of Lonbaby.

Ecillana's reign of tyranny had begun with bloodshed, it was only fitting it should end in the same way.

- - -

Many years ago, Ecillana had marched upon the House of White that sat upon Mount Putain, shot Queen Melania, and claimed the fair King Donald as her husband. After initial apathy towards the death of his wife, the king was quoted when addressing his people as saying "She is, uh fine and well, on, uh holiday with her parents," despite the whole audience having watched Ecillana throw Melania's lifeless body out of an upper-floor window just two hours earlier. It had rolled down the steep slope, eventually coming to rest at the edge of a stagnant lake, and hadn't been moved since as far as anyone could tell.

Ecillana had made certain that she had absolute control over the kingdom, even going so far as replacing all of the royal family's previous guards, with non-prejudiced, understanding, morally stable, sufficiently adept and uncorrupted people from diverse backgrounds, rather than the previous installment of bumbling racists.

But even this had been unable to let her control her new husband's tiny orange hands, who made light work of the communications systems available to him, and wasted no time in telling anyone that would listen that border-hoppers from the neighbouring kingdom of Mezido were to blame.

Unfortunately (for him) the kingdom was one of rational people, so they all quietly ignored him. Honestly, the only reason he was in a position of power was because their leadership system was hereditary; a major flaw.

The Lonbabians could not, however, ignore the many torturous and taxing laws Ecillana set in place, which, while inclusive of gender, sexuality, race, and religion, were a bit nasty.

- - -

Arthur staggered along the dusty path behind Louise, clutching at the stab wound in his stomach. It was no longer bleeding, but a jaundice-esque tinge had overtaken his prominent features, and with each step his resolve to keep going crumbled slightly.

He leant heavily on his space husky, Ciel. She was, and space huskies as a breed were, significantly larger than usual, at five feet tall, but this meant her back was the perfect height for her to be a useful armrest and crutch. She served no other apparent purpose, other than her blood bond with Ecillana's space husky, Kiki, which helped Louise and Arthur trace Ecillana's GPS location.

They neared the top of Mount Putain. As they crested the brow of the hill, the House of White came into view. It stood imposingly, the setting sun casting an appropriate blood-red light over its cold, expressionless façade.

Into battle, Louise thought determinedly. She stood straighter, feeling connected and powerful for the first time, and she wasn't even near the sea. Maybe I don't have to follow the path that has been paved for me to be strong, she thought, a flame of hope dancing in her stomach, and this time she didn't try to quell it.

Fuck I'm dying, Arthur thought with surprise, before collapsing into a heap.

- - -