A Woman Of Ice

LXXXI- Black Magic and Miracles

Diana Black knew that eventually she would need to talk to Professor Lupin. Remus, his name was. She figured that today was the best time; both of them were pretty much completely free, seeing as it was currently a Sunday, and the both of them were teachers. But then again, one of them was also probably a werewolf. Just then, Diana coincidentally saw him standing underneath the roof over the walkway toward the castle, just standing there and looking over the beautiful grounds. Diana had somewhat of an idea of how to approach him, even if she hadn't always had a great way with other people. Sure, she was funny, but not always polite or approachable or tactful. It was nice to be someone who didn't conform and sync with everyone else, but sometimes it was more of a liability, constantly dealing with misunderstandings or people not liking her at all.
  "Professor Lupin," Diana called with a slight but decent smile.
"Professor Black. You may call me Remus," he smiled politely, speaking with a fairly cheerful voice.

A little too cheerful for a werewolf about to wolf out.

"You may, of course, call me Diana," she nodded. "I'm really only, oh, after the whole possession ordeal, it's hard to tell. I believe I'm seventeen," she chuckled nonchalantly, leaning her back to the stone railing, standing beside Lupin, face to face.
"Ah. Yes, I can't say I've been in that situation. What brings you to this peaceful bridge here, Diana?" he asked curiously.
"Oh, same as you. Just enjoying the weekend. Preparing for finals like everyone else, I suppose. We all end up having to do something."
"I see. And right you are," he agreed. "I often find myself wondering which is more difficult and taxing, the job of the teacher, or the job of the student?"
"Don't we all. Honestly, I would choose being a kid no matter what. But I took this job and the Promotion because, well, I needed a challenge," she shrugged. "I've been meaning to ask you...."
"Ask away," Lupin invited warmly.
"I don't intend to pry, but as you well know, Harry Potter is my adopted brother. I don't have much of a choice in the matter. I heard from him that you were good friends, all those years ago, with our parents, the Potters. And my actual father, Sirius Black as well. Is that true?" Diana asked slowly, out of politeness and regard for Lupin's emotions, which she had been told many times was the polite and mannerly thing to do.
"Ah," he nodded. "Yes, alas, it is true. The whole ordeal caused me to question exactly where and when it was that it had all gone wrong for the poor and unfortunate Sirius. Then again, pin pointing a specific miserable point in his life wouldn't exactly be simple. Had I known then.... I would have tried everything possible to stop everything that had happened," he replied ruefully.
"Yeah, I understand. More than you would know. If you don't mind, do you think that you could tell me some things about him? Like, what his family was like, his early life, how he was as a person.... and what happened that night?"
"Yes, of course, Diana. You're his daughter, you have every right and more to know him," he offered.
"Thank you. But one more thing.... not too long ago, I was given a letter that he had written, in advance, for me. Years ago. Were you around, present in his life, when he wrote it?" Diana asked hesitantly.
"Yes, yes I was," Lupin nearly flinched.

Something's up, Diana knew.
  "Professor.... Remus, I can tell that you're hiding something. You seem like a perfectly intelligent and skilled man, but it seems that one thing you are not quite adept at is lying. In my opinion, all relationships, friendship being one of them, should be built upon a foundation of trust and honesty. You know me, or at least my reputation; I'm on the right side, your side, I believe. Not to sound arrogant, but, well.... I'm smart and definitely more than capable. Anything that you know about Sirius Black I can be trusted with," Diana assured him calmly.
  "Diana, there's only so much that you would want to know," Lupin began.
  "Really? There's only so much that I would want to know, or there's only so much that you would want me to know? Don't get it twisted, Lupin. Which f**king one is it? Be straight with me now."
  Lupin heaved a heavy sigh of defeat and reluctance. "Very well, Diana. But don't say I didn't warn you. I wrote those letters. All of them. I pretended to be Sirius Black to spare you the pain, but clearly I did not think that through."
  "No. No you f**king didn't," Diana Black agreed without hesitation.

But she mentally froze. She was mentally prepared to hear many things. In that exact moment she had braced herself to hear millions and millions of different things, but not that. When Lupin told her that, he tore away what little piece of Sirius Black that Diana thought that she knew. That little piece of Diana's father that she thought was hers. A part of her never wanted to forgive Remus Lupin for telling her what he had done. But the majority of Diana never wanted to forgive herself for forcing Lupin to tell her such a thing. Her hatred of herself, she knew, was far greater than her hatred for literally anything else. The thought was absolutely menacing. When Lupin has told her that, she was more than shocked. She felt like her whole world had been torn upside down. She felt as if she had just died. Even worse, Diana felt almost as if there were nothing good left to live for. Hope had just been torn away from her, that is, she realized, if she had ever even had any to begin with. That was the lesson that she would later on learn to carry with her everywhere and at all times throughout her difficult life; hope was just an illusion. And as frightening as the thought of being a prisoner to an illusion was, nothing seemed to outweigh the absolute terror of being prisoner to a harsh reality.