HEDONISTIC

39. Gerard is really cool also Matty is sad but whats new

EDITED

One week.

One week before Matty disappeared from Frankie's life, it was not like she had seen him for the past week: she was too busy hanging out with Gerard who had somehow turned into her 'friend'.

Frankie wasn't used to having  friends; for her friends were people that she fucked like James. It wasn't like that with Gee or Amber for the matter even tho they had kissed one night after a whole bottle of Jack Daniels.

The point was that there was one week. One week before Matty disappeared from her life. It wasn't even that she had seen him or heard his voice for the past week but she knew that he was there somewhere in the same city as hers walking the same streets.

Frankie had just came out of the cinema after a late night movie marathon of the Jigsaw movies. It was cold. Too cold. Her jean jacket felt like silk through the harsh winds. Gee was by her side.

He looked like a mad man with his new hair cut and his purple raincoat who's only purpose was being fashionable cause a raincoat like that was shit for a weather like this. She glaze at him for a moment waiting for the light sign to turn red. On Thursday he decided to cut his hair and dye it a shocking lemon yellow and it weirdly suited him.

New friends came along about as often as lottery wins for Frankie but once she had them she would relish them forever. Gee looked at her and smiled: "What did you think about the movie?" Frankie shrugged: " Well I've seen all the Jigsaw movies before but I don't understand how I still get goosebumps every times there's a jumpscare." Gee chucked.

" I feel like all we have done this past week is that we have went to midnight cinema marathons on school nights well that and getting high on parks" Gerard noticed . "Well isn't that the life?" Frankie asked. "Yeah I guess so."

"You know you're going to have to face the fact that they're leaving." Gee murmured.

"What ?" Frankie suddenly turned her heels meeting Gee's eyes with flushed cheeks and an everbeating heart. She hadn't told him about Matty, only Amber knew and she wasn't planing on getting the sweet artsy kid into her shitshow soap opera. 

"It wasn't that hard to figure out you know? There is always this look on your face when you think no one is looking, I-I know that look, I've had that look. There was this boy once, he was named just like you and I loved him, I really did but he left. He got bored but that's not the point Frankie. You don't have to tell me anything but I know is hard I don't need the details."

The silence fell upon them. They started walking again. Frankie was trying not to cry.  "You hide a lot, don't you?" Gee said, Frankie nodded surprised how this boy had being able to see through her bullshit.  She swallowed nothing trying to take in the expression on her new friend's face.

His gaze was steady, eyes wide like an innocent child, Gee released a short sharp breath.

"Everything you say is a mask but everything  gives a clue to the real you. The one hiding behind your untied hair. Someone saw that didn't they? Right? You let them in- into that fragile head of yours."

"I'm- I'm going to miss him" Frankie felt as if she was choking.

"Oh, it's a he" Gerard smiled.

"I'm not gay" Frankie said looking at him, the mood much lighter now.

"But you're not straight either" Gee pointed out.

"Touché"

"You're going to be ok" He said looking so certain and she didn't understand how because she felt as if she was going to die.

" I really hope so" she sigh.

———
He grinned at the interviewer.

"I know I am pretentious, but I'd be the first person to tell you that. And I'm not apologising, because I'm bored of indie bands that are terrified of doing anything that could be perceived as aspirational, so they don't affect the status quo of their little cliquey band world; where everyone has to think that each band is as cool as the other band"

He light a cigarette crosslegged on a expensive leather coach talking to a guy Rolling Stone Magazine sent. The interview was supposed to come out months after the album was announced, at the moment it was halfway finished and it still didn't have a name. Jamie said it was good for press so Matty talked  to some bald journalist and started playing him some of their upcoming songs.

He heard the next question halfway and started yapping about culture and consumerism and other things that he didn't even understand but it was fine only 17 year olds would take the time to read the interview anyways, they too didn't know what the fuck he was on about.

He lighted another fag, sipped  his tea and started talking 10 to the dozen about any number of unrelated things:

1. Synaesthesia: "When I'm writing a song, there's a colour there"

2. Guilt: He feels as if he's exposing his life for his lyrics (in one song, he wrote about driving to see his dying nan by himself, rather than with the family, just so he could get stoned on the way).

3. The music press: How they patronize his 17-year-old fans by assuming they won't understand his lyrics, when Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein at exactly the same age.

After an hour he smiled feeling a bit lighter, the interviewer on the other hand was a bit confused. "Do you want me to play some of the songs?"The bald guy nodded eagerly standing from the chair and adjusting his tweed blazer and gold glasses.

"The album is not finished, this one is all about conviction but I guess we already talked about how that came to be." Matty touched a few buttons and the guitar riff of Love me blasted through the speakers. He stayed quiet the other guy did too. He played him Ugh, She's American and The Sound.

The guy stayed quiet. Matty looked at the screen nervously Frankie's song was up next. He pressed the button.

"What is it called?"

"Please be naked" 

The song played softly just like her blonde curls.

"The title doesn't make the song justice"

" That was kind of the point." He sigh. It really didn't it make sense, itwas her idea. Matty smiled.

—

She rolled her eyes. "Oh please it's a great concept! Besides it's only about conviction, make the title something stupid and ridiculous so that when people listen to it they would be dumbfounded"

He laughed. "Like what?" He asked. "Mhm I don't know... something stupid and sexual so that when people listen to it they expect a over the top shitty track, preparing you for a song less thoughtful and then surprising you"

—
"I guess that was the point when you hear the title you expect an over the top shitty track, I guess it suggests a song less thoughtful and then it surprises you"

"I love the concept, all the cars- it sounds so different from your normal style but I think that's what this whole album is about. Who came up with the idea of the song?" The guy asked adjusting his glasses.

" A friend" he muttered. "A very good friend." Fuck. 

—

"Yeah, I want it to be ambient make it sound like something Brian Eno wrote and thought it was shit. Make it nice and rough. I wanna hear the cars and the streets and you. So that when you imminently go I can still listen to that song with my headphones on and not be able to distinguish from the cars in the song to the honks in the actual street."

This fucking book has gone so huge it's crazy I'm so utterly shocked,thank you all so much for reading it and being patient with this old bitch thank you thank  you thank you. As always if you have a request for where you want the story to go please leave a comment, if you don't leave a comment anyway they really make my day. Ly.