Red Dahlia

Chapter 15: Black hole

Helloo from the other side~

Qotd: Stress is a choice, so is peace.
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I think I knew exactly what I wanted. I knew the answer to that question.

Everyday,

Alone at home.

He lies awake at the crack of dawn,

Awake and living a new nightmare.

Everyday,

Puffy red eyes.

His mind wanders to the unknown,

Fighting a battle with demons in his mind.

Everyday,

Trapped in misery.

He hears voices in his head,

Practically eating away his brain.

Everyday,

Is another prayer.

Echoing from his bones,

Asking God to take him now.

Everyday,

Everyday.

I don't deserve to live. After all I'm a prisoner of mind. It's like I'm falling in a black hole, you just keep on falling. There is no end unless you reach the end. There is also no way out, you just keep on falling accepting your fate.

I reflected upon my life, all the good I've done. Although there is more bad, there is still good. Life is all about good or bad.

I dragged my form which was lying on the floor looking at the makeshift galaxy to the bathroom.

I locked myself in the bathroom. I noticed the bags under my eyes, the stubble on my jaw, my bloodshot eyes.

"You're a murderer Tobias." A familiar voice spoke from behind me.

I turned around to see my dad standing there. My knees felt weak. He was there, standing right in front of me. Yet I felt he was very far away from me.

"You're the reason why we're not here." A disembodied voice spoke. I snapped my head in the direction of the sound.

Kaylee was there advancing towards me and Dad. She stopped right beside me.

"NO! NO!" I screamed.

"I DIDN'T KILL YOU! I AM NOT A MURDERER!" I screamed more.

"Look around Tobias, we're all dead. All except you, why is that so?" Another voice spoke. This time it was my mother and besides her was my step-father.

Seeing all of them cornering me made my knees weak till I eventually gave out. My sobs echoed through the whole house.

"You're a murderer Tobias." They all kept on saying in a monotonous voice.

I blocked my ears and screamed. I slammed my hand on the mirror. All of its pieces shattered, I grabbed a piece with sharp edges and firmly held it.

The sharp edges cut through my skin and in my flesh. This pain was just temporary, living will cause me more pain.

I heard the door rattle I held it close. I could hear V's muffled voice.

"Let me in Tobias!"

"No, I just wanna be alone."

"Aren't you even gonna let me in?" He spoke.

"No."

"Fine be it like that." And with that I heard him stalk away.

I slid down, placed the sharpest edge on my wrist. This is for all the bad I've done.

I swiped the piece resulting in a gigantic gash on my wrist. Although it hurt, it was nothing compared to what I felt on a daily basis. All the guilt I carried around.

I felt like I was breathing my last breaths.

Is this it?

A certain blue haired girl appeared in front of my eyes. Her smile not even fading. I smiled at her.

"Is this what you want?" Her voice was smooth yet distant.

I gulped. My throat was very dry. I just nodded not having the energy to talk as blood oozed out of my wrist.

The door burst open as Z stood there smiling.

"Hah! I used the spare k- OMG WHAT THE FUCK TOBIAS!?" He screamed.

I've been a burden to him too. He ran out to get his phone. I heard him call for an ambulance.

I'm sorry, but it was already too late.

I felt my body go limp as I couldn't control myself.

I blinked slowly, allowing myself to finally meet my family.

Before I could finally close my eyes, I saw a worried Rafe and a teary-eyed V. I felt him shaking me. I heard him saying stay with me. I heard Z wailing. Then nothing.

No sound was heard. There was just darkness. Between living stressfully and dying peacefully, I chose to die peacefully as I was finally at peace.

But does peace feel like this? There is still some uneasiness. Like when you are constantly being stared at with thousand spotlights right in your face. Like is there something on my face? Is there something wrong with my clothes? Did I wear the wrong shoes or are my socks not matching with each other?

It was like I had finally reached the end of the black hole.

But why was I still falling?

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Wow two updates back to back. Sorry for the short chapter.
Imma gonna leave you to cry.as I myself am crying.
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