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22. C h e c k - I n

t w e n t y - t w o : check in

|check in : a facebook feature where you can look up the recent places (malls, hotels, cities etc) that you've visited/ are visiting|

You know, how I was cribbing about my first day in the beginning of year? Well, let me just tell you that I was incredibly naive back then. It's indeed ironical that now when the school year is finally ending, for the first time in forever, I am actually dreading it.

I mean this was it -- the summer before senior year. The last two months of sanity before I threw myself into the big bad world of college applications. It wasn't like I didn't want to move forward. It was more like the very prospect of going out in the world, living on my own, probably without most if not all of my friends and family, it was downright scary. And perhaps, even scarier was facing the truth, i.e. what if things don't go as I plan. What if no university accepts my application? What would I do then?

So, to give my overbearing pessimism and my extremely overworked brain a rest, I had decided that summer would be all about fooling around with my friends. And yes, you read it right. I said 'friends'. The plural form of the noun. As in more than one human. As in a group of more than two people hanging out together. I mean -- uh, well, you probably get it.

There was a point when all of us: best friends, friends, acquaintances and some strangers sat together as a group and planned out every last detail about what all we were gonna do. But after last week, I didn't know what to think anymore.

The problem is not even a problem actually. It is, in fact, a really good news. You see, it wasn't every day when someone got picked to attend a summer math program at an Ivy League. For Daniel it was an exclusive opportunity. For me it was a hell lot of overthinking about the fact that I would have spend an entire summer without my boyfriend.

So, here is where I lay down all the facts. Lately, it had been all about him pushing me out of my comfort zone and getting me to talk to new people. It had been about me getting to know his friends. It had been about petty arguments, about Lexi getting on my nerves, about him still talking to Jenna and being jealous of Nicky (yes, I'm obviously talking about prom night).

I was torn between my increased popularity on social media, and my inability to hold a conversation in real life. I'd never felt so exhausted. I enjoyed the attention I got online, but somehow, it never seemed to extend in real life, especially because Jenna and her little clique couldn't be bothered.

I really was happy that I made a new identity for myself in school. I was the girl who loved high heels, who was scared of make up, and I was no longer the girl who only caught people's attention because of her boyfriend. Finally, I was Victoria Crowe and not just Daniel's girlfriend.

Coming back to the said boyfriend, I was really really looking forward to spending time with him outside of all the baggage that school warranted. I wanted to curl up with him and binge play video games, without worrying about the people at school. But there was of course, no way in hell I was going to hold him back.

He was a freaking math genius, and he simply couldn't not attend the program. Even if I was afraid the distance would drive a wedge between us. But I couldn't and I wouldn't be the reason that he misses such an absolutely amazing opportunity.

There was really, no deciding what I was going to to about it, though. I was going to call him over later today, and at school, I was sticking close to him with a wide-ass grin playing the role of an extremely proud girlfriend.

I could only desperately hope we come out of this unscathed.

Call me dramatic, but I really don't do well with the whole distance thing. I know it's not forever and it's definitely not a very long time (just about two months?) . You could say that people maintain long distance relationship for years, but let's just say that the only experience that I've had with distance is my dad walking out of my life, and Daniel moving away.