See Me Now (Mirry: Harry Styles&Michael Clifford)

Chapter 21

*Michael's POV*

I hate myself for saying that one horrible sentence... 'We need to talk'... Who says that... It just is not done. It's the same like 'It's not you, it's me'. So... guess what I say next...

"It's not you Harry, it's me..."

"Mike?"

"Let me talk Harry... Please... Or I'll never do this and it will be for the worst..."

His broken look says it all... I just want to slap myself in the face or hit my head against a wall for doing this... but I need to. I overstayed my welcome.

"Harry... you... You learned me the true definition of love, you learned me what it is to be loved and how to love someone else without being afraid of that feeling. You learned me to enjoy the small gestures in life, the small touches you give me, the adorable laughs Niall lets out. You taught me to be young, yet responsible... Thanks to you I had the chance to caress your luscious curls, to poke your adorable dimples, to gaze into your deep forest green eyes, hear your happy smile, hold your hand, kiss your perfect lips, be your big spoon. God, I have never known love before you, but I'm glad you showed me... I love you for giving me the best few months I could ever experience in my life. The gratitude and love I feel for you are so big, I cannot but them in words. Yet... No matter how I want to hold on to this perfect little world of ours, I can't... You have to let me break up with you Harry..."

Tears are streaming down my face at this point, falling onto my nose, my lips and my shirt... It takes everything in me not to give up and just sob, make him take me back, but I can't. Rules are rules, even in my world and if we are totally honest... I don't deserve that perfect boy...

"Just know, my pain will be twice as hard as yours. I mean, I have to break up with you and I have to live without you. No clue how I am going to cope, but rules are rules. I wasn't meant to get attached to you Harry... Yet, I did. I knew this couldn't last long, I knew... But I was selfish, I wanted to know what it was to be with you. I shouldn't have. This was the best time of my life though and I will always think back on it with the fondest memories and a lot of love. I will never love anyone the way I love you and if I could find another way to be with you I would. Unfortunately this isn't a fairy tale and I don't have a fairy godmother. I love you Harry, always and forever, but I do understand if you hate me now. You should, it would make it so much easier on you." 

After the end of my speech my body is racking with soundless sobs, I am spent... Every ounce of energy left my body when I told Harry we were over. The cold invades me and goes straight through every vein, bone and into my heart. I don't think he knows how much I love him, how I won't be able to survive without him... But I have to be strong now...

"Mikey, please... Let me talk to this Simon guy, I can change his mind. Don't go telling me it won't work cause I can't see him... I see you, I saw Ashton. Please Mike. Don't give up on us. I don't care if no one can see you, none of that matters... I see you now... Not only your perfect looks and your scruffy way of dressing, but also your inside. You are perfect. Stay with me... We can work this out."

"I really can't Harry. This wasn't a good timing at all to have this conversation, cause I have to go to my meeting and no, I'm not saying that to get rid of you."

"Come back afterwards?"

"Harry... Please don't make this harder on yourself.", I whisper...

"Please Mike, break your plans... Please..."

He walks over to me, hugs me close and starts humming... I don't know what to do, I just know I can't hug him back cause if I do... So I just let my arms hang down awkwardly, looking up to the ceiling. Breaking free is what I should be trying to do, but I am crushing his heart already, I can't crush his entire being...