The Fire That Sparked My Soul- Newtmas AU

Chapter Twenty Nine

♫Hysteria by Muse

~A whole chapter of Newtmas fluff because I haven't wrote enough throughout this fic!

~There will be another update at the weekend, it may be the final one, but I might decide to write an epilogue!

Being slammed against a wall, Thomas laughed at Newt's messy, forceful kisses. Excluding their kiss from earlier, they hadn't done anything romantic in three months. They had never been on a proper date, and Thomas so desperately wanted to change that.

But he also liked doing this.

Cupping the back of Newt's neck with one hand and his waist with the other, he pried himself off the wall and hoisted Newt on to hips, earning a satisfied moan in the process. Thomas smiled into their kiss, causing Newt to do the same. 

Their movements were in sync; lips moving at the same time and at the same pressure, tongues occasionally grazing the other's lips. Thomas walked them over to the bed, placing Newt down first and sliding his body between his legs, rolling his hips. 

Newt arched his back, tilting his head backwards, which gave Thomas the opportunity to kiss along his jawline (slowly to tease him) and down his neck. He picked one spot and bit down, and, once more, Newt let out a muffled moan. 

They thanked the lord Rose was out getting grocery shopping, otherwise they would never have gotten away with this. 

When Thomas was satisfied with the mark he left, he admired it for a short moment before returning his lips to Newt's again. The pure bliss that ran through his body, sending shivers down his spine, made his heart race and his body heat. His fingers ran up Newt's shirt, unsure whether or not he should remove it.

"It's okay, Tommy," Newt whispered when he caught a breath. "It's okay."

Thomas knew what he would see if he removed the shirt- scars, and it made him nervous. He sat up, gesturing to Newt to do the same. He shakily peeled Newt's top from his body and threw it to the floor. 

Newt's upper body was skinny; so skinny and frail that you could see his ribcage. Never the less, he was still beautiful. He would always be beautiful to Thomas. 

TW

"Can I...?" Thomas wasn't sure how to ask, but Newt knew what he was trying to say. nodding, let turned his arms up, showing Thomas the self inflicted marks. The majority of them were faded and disappearing, but they were still noticeable. Truly, they would never disappear. Visibly, yes, but not mentally.

They would always be there, hurting Newt, even if they weren't open and bleeding. 

They would always take a toll on him, reminding him of everything he went through, reminding him of every negative thought he had.

They would always pain Thomas, because he hated the fact he never knew about Newt's self harming. 

But hopefully that would never happen again. 

Thomas ran his thumb over each individual scar, inspecting it closely, trying to figure out it's purpose. "You're still the most gorgeous boy I've ever met," Thomas said, fighting back tears. "You're stunning. These won't ever change what I think about you."

"These," Newt gestured to his arms, "should be burned and forgotten. they're ugly, and they make me look weak."

TW OVER

Thomas lifted Newt's chin to look in his eyes, "you could never be weak. You're still alive, and there's a reason for that. How you can tell me anything but that confuses me."

Newt didn't reply, he only removed Thomas's t-shirt instead, climbing on to his lap afterwards. Thomas's nails dug into Newt's back as he took his own revenge by leaving multiple marks on his neck. 

Thomas's pants were heavy whereas Newt's were more controlled, but they wouldn't be for much longer. Newt grinded his hips against Thomas', resting his head on his shoulder to hide his flushing red cheeks. 

"You know," Thomas breathed out, "we should be studying for our exams."

"I know," Newt replied, "but I would much rather be doing this."

"Me too," Thomas laughed. "Did I ever tell you how much I love you?"

"Never."

"Well, I love you."

Their night followed pursuit; whispering words into each others ears as they continued to kiss... and go further than they ever had before.

Neither of them regretted it.

Neither of them were unsatisfied.

Neither of them wanted to re-do it.

They never wanted to stop.

They only wanted time to pause so they could stay like that forever.