Hindi Mo Lang Napansin

Kabanata 18

Kabanata 18 Paglaya at Paghusga

Nilakasan ko ang loob ko at sa mismong numero ako ng aking tatay ako tumawag. I want him to know what happen to his son. At gusto ko nang magsabi talaga sa kanya dahil ayaw ko nang magtago pa sa kanya ng sikreto.

Denial ko kaagad ang numero niya at masaya akong tumugon siya sa aking tawag.

" Dad, its me Kenneth.." sabi ko kaagad at narinig ko si papa na parang umiiyak.

" why you didn't call me ? your last call is year 20XX .." narinig kong umiiyak si papa pero pinigilan kong umiyak.

" because dad, uhmm.. because I feel guilty ..." diretsahan kong sabi sa kanya.

" guilty ? of what ?" sagot nito sa akin mula sa kabilang linya.

" dad .. im Gay.. im sorry because im turn into like this but im not expecting this to happen.. dad I try to persuade myself to be a guy but I cant because I don't have attraction in any women I dated.." paliwanag ko at narinig kong mas lalong umiyak si papa sa kabilang linya.

" I already know that .. but im expecting that youll say it to me in advance .. when your was a kid a already feel that you have a side that so feminine so don't worry .. im not mad but disappointed because you didn't talk to me for years.." sabi nito at doon ako naiyak .

" im sorry dad.. im so sorry.. I promised that ill call you everyday.." sabi ko at naiyak lalo si papa sa kabilang linya. Hindi ko alam na alam na pala ni papa na Gay ako at nagtatampo siya dahil hindi ko siya natawagan at ineexpect pala niyang tatawagan ko siya.

" okay.. im looking forward to your promised.." sabi ni papa at ngayon tumahan na ito sa pagiyak at ganun din ako.

" i promised.. " sabi ko at yun nga nagkuwento ako ng tungkol sa nangyayari sa akin pero hindi ko ikinuwento yung tungkol sa nanliligaw sa akin. My dad feel proud when I tell him that im the leader of basketball team in the school. And also I tell him that im a scholar too.

" im proud for what you've done for past years.. expect us in your graduation.. I will used my leave in my work and I persuade your mom too to plan a leave in her work too to attend your graduation.." sabi niya at natuwa naman ako.

" where is Chemney "? Sabi ko at tumawa lang si papa.

" in her school.. shes beautiful and I tell her that she has a big sister to meet.." nakakalokong sabi ni papa.

" PAPA !!! please don't tell her .. let me handle that okay.." sabi ko sa kanya.

" okay its your choice not mine.. but assure you she want a big sister.." sabi nito at tumatawa nanaman ang tatay ko. asarin ba naman ang anak niya ? ghwad..

" okay .. ill ed this call because we have practice this afternoon dad.. im the leader of the team so expect that im busy .. but ill find time to call you and mom.." bilin ko sa kanya.

" okay.. ill tel to your mom that you revel your self to me.. id also know that your mom know your sexuality but you guyz not open it to me.. but I understand.." sabi niya.

" okay dad.. goodbye for now.." sagot ko at pinatayko ang tawag.

Masaya akong naglakad hanggang sa makarating ako sa court. Nakita ko silang busy sa wawarm up at ako naman nagpatuloy na ako sa paglalakad at kaagad akong pumunta sa locker room ng damit at doon nagbihis. Naramdaman ko na lang na may yumakap sa likuran ko at alam ko na kung sino yun.