Fix You.

[9]

"God, that was close." Dallas said, sliding down the wall of a building to sit down. I joined him, lighting my match for my cigarette on his dog tags. He smiled at me.

"You sure do got guts, kid." he said.

"I ain't a damn kid. I'm 19. Older than you." I snapped.

"Yeah, a whole year. How was I supposed to know? You're so damn small." he said, taking a drag on his cigarette.

"Thanks. I'd rather be small than fat."

I sat with one knee up and my arm across it. We were in some alleyway, I didn't know where, but I could find my way back.

There was a silence.

"How come you ain't talk much anymore? Or go out to parties? I've heard all these wild stories about Mr. big and bad Dallas Winston, but I ain't never seen any of 'em." My accent was coming through, it always does when I'm drunk.

"I don't know, man, I just ain't been feelin' it, ya know?" he said.

"Is it because your buddy died? Jesus Christ, it's been 6 months, and if I've learned anything from the Curtis brothers, it's that you just don't stop living when you lose somebody." I said, taking a drag on my cigarette.

He exploded.

"You don't know shit! I agree to go drinking with you and you act like you know me up and down and sideways! Let me tell you something, you don't know anything about me, and you sure as hell don't know shit about who Johnny was!"

"Dal-"

"I tried to kill myself! I couldn't save Johnny, and I couldn't even kill myself! I can't do anything right!" Even in the dim moonlight I could tell he was red with anger.

"Dally, I'm sorry, maybe I was a little too harsh." I tried to put my arm around him but he shoved it off so fast and hard I almost cried out in pain.

"Don't fucking touch me. I don't need your damn pity. I've had enough of it." He snapped. He started to get up.

"Dallas, no, come back here. We're both drunk and I just know you're gonna do something stupid if you leave by yourself." He proceeded to get up and walk down the alleyway.

"Goddammit, Winston.." I got up and started to run after him.

I caught up to him, and grabbed his arm. He tried to jerk it away but I had an iron grip.

"Look at me." I told him. He looked at me, but not in the eyes.

"I'm sorry about what I said, I-I just... I ain't never had anybody so I don't know what it's like to lose somebody. I'm fucking sorry, okay? I know I'm a bitch."  I looked in his eyes, and he stared at me back.

I then got on my tiptoes and kissed him.