Got It?

Eternal Love

Aries didn't know what was wrong, but nowadays she never seemed to know. Soleis had stormed out of the house again in a destructive ball of fury. Normally, this was the part where Aries would stay back and cry, but tonight she was just tired. Tired of fighting, tired of being wrong. Even the stabbing guilt that normally accompanied these arguments was missing. Aries was too tired. She was sick of holes in their once honeymoon-perfect relationship. She lacked the motivation to run after Soleis, or even call her and try to fix things. This time, she wondered if it even could be fixed. In order to save a sinking boat, you have to be able to find the crack. But what do you do when there's more than one hole, and you don't even know where to start? Aries had no idea where they went wrong and she was sick of frantically bailing water. She didn't know which of them cracked first, or who needed to be fixed.
The argument started off harmless, a little squabble about whatever. It started off as they all did. Then Soleis would get defensive and Aries would get scared and lash out. The real arguments, complete with personal attacks and tears, were always Aries' doing. She lashed out when provoked, it's always been one of her major personality flaws. Still, she never thought it would come in between her and Soleis. Her and her soulmate. Aries used to believe in the magic of that word. The idea that the perfect person was out there, waiting for you. Soleis may not have been perfect, but she was much closer to it than Aries was. Unfortunately, Aries no longer believed in magic.
She wasn't sure if she even believed in love.
"Mum?" Raymond's curious head popped out from the top of the stairs. Aries quickly wiped away the stray tears that she hadn't previously noticed falling.
"Yes, Love?"
"Where's mummy?" Aries forced a smile and instantly took back her previous doubts about love. She knew love was real because she knew she loved this brown haired boy more than anything.
"She had to run to the store quickly, she'll be back soon."
"She didn't get to tell me my bedtime story." This time, Aries' smile wasn't forced. Soleis claimed that children's stories were pointless and that they didn't teach the important morals. She insisted on telling Raymond a story she made up herself before bedtime. Aries expected her to back down after a few days of having to come up with story ideas, but Soleis loved it. It was her special time with Raymond, right before bed.
"Mum, can you tell me a story instead?"
"Of course." Aries ascended the stairs and took Raymond's hand, leading him back to his room. Instead of an excited smile, Raymond's tiny eyebrows were furrowed.
"I know you and mummy are sad," he said, and Aries' heart dropped. The guilt came flooding back and she knew she had to fix things between her and Soleis, once and for all. If she couldn't do it for herself, she had to do it for Raymond.
"We'll be fine," she reassured him.
"When mummy is sad, she tells me stories about you two. When you were younger." Aries's lips parted slightly, her eyelids fluttering as she realized she didn't even know what bedtime stories Soleis told him. "She tells me about how you two love each other."
Aries was at loss for words. After these fights, while Aries sulked and felt bad for herself, Solies was telling stories of their love to their son. Aries had thought that maybe Soleis was starting to get tired of her; that maybe that was the reason Soleis was continuously starting pointless arguments. But maybe not. Maybe Aries was wrong about lots of things.
"Did mummy tell you the time I fell off a roof?" Raymond giggled, shaking his head.
"We were at a party, and all the people were starting to be too much for Mummy. I could see it in her eyes, that she was almost reaching her limit, so I suggested we sneak off somewhere. Our friend had a porch, and with the porch, a flat part of the roof that hung lower than the rest. One of the windows was high enough that we could climb up onto it. I helped her up first, then followed her to the roof. Everything was quiet. Maybe it was feeling so close to the stars, maybe it was our youth, but I know there was a type of magic in the air that night. We layed on our backs and stargazed like a cliche young couple. When I was a teen I was interested in astronomy and I finally got to show off my knowledge. I pointed out constellations as your mummy layed beside me and spun the stars into romantic poetry. When I ran out of stars I knew, I made the names up. Sol- mummy joined me and the names got sillier and sillier as time went on. Soon we were laughing until our chests hurt. Eventually, mummy got up and said we should rejoin the party. I wasn't ready to leave yet, so I suggested we dance. I grabbed my phone and found the worst pop song I could think of and before she had time to react, I was dancing. It wasn't good dancing, mind you. It may have been the worst I've ever danced in my life. But that was the point, I guess. I just wanted to see her laugh. And she did. She laughed at me, then joined me, and we were both flailing around on that roof. Each song the moves increased in spontaneity and eventually, I got too close to the edge. You know how clumsy I am."
Raymond giggled, remembering all the times his Mum had dropped things or tripped over toys. His tiny freckles scrunched up as his nose wrinkled. Aries laughed with him, her previous troubles forgotten for the moment.
"I was lucky the part of the roof wasn't higher, or else I could have broken a bone. Instead, I just dislocated my shoulder. Soleis was down in a flash, going back through the window and rushing out the back door. I was crying because it hurt, but I was also laughing at myself. With all my clumsiness, I had never managed to fall off a roof before. Sol was more worried than I was, maybe I was in shock from the injury, I'm not sure. She put my arm back in place, knowing what to do from a first aid class we had taken months before. Once my arm was back to normal she relaxed, smiling fondly and shaking her head at how ridiculous it all was. Eventually, we went back inside. We didn't tell our friends about the incident, it was something that was just ours. It was something from another dimension, one where nothing could ever change."
"Has it changed, now?" Raymond asked sleepily. He was exhausted, struggling to stay awake for the end of the story. Heavy wasn't often a word used to describe a child, but Raymond looked heavy, resisting the pull of sleep. Aries took the question seriously as she thought of her and Solies. Of all the little moments they still share. Of all the inside jokes and stolen kisses. Yes, they argued, but those arguments were not the end of them. Their love was eternal. It wasn't something that could be put out by unimportant bickering. For a moment, Aries had forgotten that.
"No," she whispered. "Nothing important has changed."
Raymond's head bobbed in a tired nod. Aries wasn't sure how much of this he would remember the next morning, but she hoped she had given him a satisfactory story. She kissed his forehead, tucking the blankets around him.
"Goodnight." Aries wasted no time going downstairs and immediately reached for her phone. She didn't let the lack of messages from Soleis unnerve her, and instead went to her favourites to get Solies' contact. Aries took a steadying breath, suppressed her doubts, and called her wife.
"Sol? Where are you? I'm coming to pick you up and I'm sorry. We need to work this out, once and for all. I love you, with every inch of my heart, and this needs to stop." Aries grabbed her keys in her hand and headed towards the door.
"I'm outside," It was a relief to hear Soleis' voice, and Aries could tell she was no longer angry. "I came to apologize. I'm unfair with my expectations of you, you're not a mind reader. How are you supposed to know something bothers me if I never tell you?" These words were enough for Aries to hang up and rush towards the door, opening it and embracing her wife.
"I'm sorry," Soleis said, hugging Aries desperately.
"No, I'm sorry," Aries replied. The two women hugged like it was the last time they would
be able to. Sometimes, hugs were more meaningful than kisses and this was one of those times. Soleis and Aries hugged like they were trying to simultaneously hold each other together and fight off the world.
"We can both be sorry." Aries tugged Soleis inside, shutting the door on the darkness
outside. And with the door, both Soleis and Aries vowed to shut off the doubts in their heads and instead just trust each other. They held on to one another and vowed to put their love above their stubbornness, just like they did when they were younger. No matter their age, their love was eternal, and they vowed to preserve it.
When you feel like your boat is sinking, sometimes the best thing to do is grab a life vest.