Bit of a push

Chapter 7

Chapter 7... Here you are! ;) Thanks xoxox

Mackenzie

“Keep your arms up Mackenzie!” Reese directed. Instantly, I put them up, him throwing a swing. I held them tight to the sides of my head, bouncing from foot to foot. I stepped forward and swung at him, making him groan. From left to right bouncing keeping my balance.

“Keep going!” He shouted. I tried to keep my breathing under control, but my wheezing was too loud, making my throat sore. My body screaming at me to stop. To quit. But I’m a fighter. I don’t give up, I’m a survivor. 

“Okay, warm down with some jump rope.” He again directed. I put my hands on my knees and kept my body down, trying to catch my breath.

Minutes passed and I finally raised and decided I should call mother. I stepped through the ropes, but my feet could barely hold up without wobbling. Suddenly, a set of warm fingers gently, but firmly, took my left arm, holding my body up.

 “Whoa, easy there, Mack.” His breath was warm on my neck, making my body shiver. I turned my head to face him and his undeniably sexy features had me holding my breath. His green eyes on me and me alone, his smile for me and me alone, his lips for me and me alone…

The guilt has now betrayed my insides. We never should’ve kissed that night on the Ferris wheel. He won’t want me after he rolls my sleeve up that little further to see my scars. The thought of his touching me has me squirming out of his hold. I wiggled, only to make him grip on me dig deeper.

 “Mack, what’s wrong?”

I couldn’t look him in the eye and say everything’s fine. Because it’s not. It feels like a stab in the stomach telling him things are okay. But I have no choice, unless I tell him… the truth. The ugly, cold-hearted truth. 

“Nothing. I’m just really hot.” I said, and then deep laughter.

“You’re hot in more ways than one, my Beautiful Mack.” I smiled, but I knew it didn’t hit my eyes.

He stood behind me, waiting. But my legs ached, so I leaned into him. His talented lips began kissing a hot trail up my neck. I arched it, giving him a better range. He moaned from the back of his throat, and I thought it was the sexiest noise I’ve ever heard on the planet.

 “Mack, are you going to tell me what’s wrong, or am I going to have to torture you out of it.” His husky whisper had me giggling, but I never relaxed.

“Well, torturing me sounds a little fun…” His laughs made me smile, again not forming from my eyes. In lightning fast movements, he was in front of me and had his lips of mine before I could even say ‘huh?’.

His hands on the curve on my waist were making my heart race. His lips only pecked mine, but it was still appreciated.

“Mack, what’s wrong? I know you. Better than anyone. And I can tell in a heartbeat when something isn’t right.”  

I take him by surprise when I get out of his hold and I take a few steps away from him. The hurt in his eyes was hard to miss. Game over. I lose.

“Mackenzie…” His husky whisper had invisible tears filling my eyes. I won’t cry in front of the man who made me wail in secrecy for years. I will not show my insecurity.

“I can’t do this.”

“What do you mean?”

I sighed, trying to wrap my brain around my thoughts and feelings. But it feels like wrapping my arms around my body seems like a good substitute. “The thing is… what if tomorrow you wake up and realize all my flaws and my imperfections and you won’t look at me the same as you do today.”

 It felt like I was pouring out my soul to this boy. And not just in drops into cups at a time, it was like all at once. A tsunami of my soul 

His eyes widened. I’m not sure from realization, or surprise.

“Mackenzie... to me, you’re perfect.”

I scrunched my nose and shook my head.

“You are.”

“I’m not!” I yelled. “Geez Dan, I’m not perfect. What are you talking about? I’m a piece. Of. Trash. Okay? I’m a piece of trash that nobody wants. The only one who doesn’t think that is… you. Well wake up, pretty boy! I’m worthless.” And the last wave has hit the shore.

 Dan

 She told me last night she was worthless. She told me she was a piece of trash… She told me she was the piece of trash that nobody wants. When she told me that’s what she thought of herself like that, I wanted holding her forever trying to convince her that she was perfect. Because she is. Her deep blue eyes and her dirty blonde hair wasn’t just pretty, it was beautiful. Her sense of style was better and classier than any of the girls in our year. She was smarter than… anyone in this year! But it’s not her looks or her style or her brain had me attracted to her all these years. It was her personality that made me fall for her. She could always make me laugh and she could always make me feel better.

I was going to tell her this but she wasn’t even at school today. She told me before she bolted from the gym, leaving me unable to breathe. She had a kickboxing competition she had to attend. She told her parents that it was a spelling bee. But walking the same school hallways without her beside me made things dull. It made things seem meaningless. 

I hung out with the boys and Jacob, the one I gave my football position to. He was an official ass-kisser in my opinion. The thing about these people is that everybody laughed at my jokes, everybody agreed with my argument, everybody complements me on the smallest things… Everybody kisses my ass.

But I sat in science alone. Science was Mackenzie’s and my subject and I didn’t want to sit with anyone other than her in here.

A low whistle came from the back of the classroom as clicks of heels come to my senses.

“Hey Dan.” A seductive whisper caught my attention as I looked over my shoulder to see Amanda smiling down at me.

“Hi Amanda.” I said boringly and looked back down at my notes. From the corner of my eye, I saw her sitting down next to me. I saw her outfit, but didn’t bother to appreciate it. A black skirt, which seems to end at her upper thigh and a hot pink singlet crop top. Her jean jacket doesn’t seem to do any good for what I can see. The skin of her breasts show, and her heels seem to be too high for school.

“Dan, we need to talk.”

“Well, I’m kind of doing my work right now-“

“Quiet please!” The teacher called from his desk at the other side of the room. The glare in his eyes were angry and I didn’t bother back chatting. I didn’t volunteer to talk to Amanda.

Amanda’s voice turned into a whisper. “I don’t like how we ended things.”

I snapped my head to hers. The fake innocence was oozing out of her.

“Why?”

“Because I think we can have another go. My feelings for you haven’t changed.” She stated and I looked down at my thigh to see her rubbing it. It was uncomfortable and awkward.

“Mine have.” Those two words made her hand fall back to her side. She looked down at herself, embarrassed. And so she should be.

“I don’t even understand why we broke up. Was it because of that Mackenzie chick?”

“Yes, it was. She gives me things you always thought were ridiculous. You wanted the physical and no emotional. You didn’t even want to get the chance to know me before you wanted me to take something from you so significant in your life, and you didn’t bother that I didn’t care.”

 I exhaled a breath, which felt like I was holding for a long time. A few years to be exact. The hurt in her eyes began to eat at my soul. I’d hurt a woman. She stood and stalked away, not turning back. Knowing I’d hurt her makes my insides hurt. Shit! I just did something I convinced myself I’d never, ever do. At that moment, I was my father.