Could be a Star

Chapter 12

Max hasn't been the same since the incident with the gum and the clones. I've not seem him properly smile since and he just keeps his head down when he's walking. When Mr Sharp asked him if he was doing okay, he just smiled weakly and said

'I'm always okay,'

I'm worried about him and I get this horrible feeling in my stomach whenever he comes to mind. I just really really really want him to be okay with himself.

I'm still enjoying rehearsals though.

Kate must have been working on her Geordie accent for a while because it's getting really convincing.

Mr Sharp has kept me and Kate in alone one lunch time to practice the scene where I get really angry with her and she slaps me.

He tells us that Kate has to make the slapping sound, but I have to make it real.

He teaches Kate how to slap her own hand but make it look like she is slapping my face. It's quite funny because every time she makes the slapping sound, she apologises to me, even though she never even touches my face.

When Mr Sharp is convinced that it doesn't look like she is slapping her hand, he tells me to act as if I've just been slapped.

At first, I just hold my face and gasp but Mr Sharp tells me he wants more so I stumble and then he tells me that he wants a little less.

Acting is hard.

In the end, he has me holding my face, jumping ever so slightly and not making a sound, just staring directly at Kate.

We run the slap. And suddenly, for the first time, I don't feel like myself anymore, I feel like I am Billy Elliot and I have just been slapped. And although it was Mrs Wilkinson who slapped me, I want to hug her and I want her to tell me that everything is going to be okay. But then I think about being okay and I think about Max and I'm Jack again and I have an ache in my stomach.

'Wow!' says Kate once we've finished the scene 'That felt like it was amazing!'

'Don't flatter yourself, Kate,' Mr Sharp warns 'That's was I'm here for. It was amazing!'

Me and Kate are a good team, as she says to me after the rehearsal.

***

That night, I'm walking home with Ricky.

'Are you friends with Max Barnaby from year 8?' he asks me out of the blue

'Erm yep,' I say slightly confused

'Apparently he's really weird,' says Ricky

'That's not a very nice thing to say, Ricky,'

'I just heard it,' there's a pause. 'Apparently he's gay,'

'Who told you that?'

'So it's not true?' he asks

'I never said that,'

'So it is true?'

'I didn't say that either,' I tell him raising my voice 'Who told you, anyway?'

'I heard Zack Kingston telling some people today,'

I might have guessed.

'Ricky, you know that most of what he says is complete rubbish,'

'Yeah but what he says does have evidence sometimes,'

'Evidence? What evidence?' he's really annoying me now

'Well like that time in primary school he said that that Sophie Allen was raised by elves,'

'Yeah and that obviously isn't true!'

'But she's really small,'

'So?'

'Evidence!'

'Ricky, you're not making any sense,'

'Yeah but Max Barnaby tap dances doesn't he?'

'So?'

'Well,'

'Just because he dances, it doesn't mean he's gay,'

'Yeah but is he?'

'Is what?' I almost shout

'Is Max Barnaby from year 8 gay?' he shouts back

'I don't know! Why do you even care anyway? I'm going to miss my bus, bye,'

What I told Ricky was the truth, in all fairness. I don't know for sure if Max is gay. I have my thoughts on the matter but nothing is definite. If he is I don't care, it doesn't change how I feel, I'm still his friend. And if he is gay, it doesn't mean that I am. So I don't understand why Ricky wants to know so badly?

I haven't even known Max that long come to think of it so why would he tell me?

But then who will he tell?

Nobody?

Because I don't even know who his other friends are.

Maybe he just won't tell anyone because he's ashamed.

But why should he be?

Surely his mum wouldn't give him a hard time about it and people like Alex and Zack just aren't worth caring about.

Surely Max doesn't think they are?

I don't know, I don't understand.

In fact, there are lots of things I don't understand about Max.