Do you too? Nick and Grace

Restless Night

Nick's Perspective

I had to ask her, the silence was killing me, "Are we okay?". There was complete another moment of awkwardness lasting for a while. I studied her reaction, her face blushing red. She took a deep breathe and locked eyes with me. " I just don't, I not sure about the whole moving in, I feel like everything is being rushed." I understood I was about a year and a half ago when I and my dad moved her. So much has happened. "It's okay to feel anxious and unsure, it's only natural. But whatever happens we can make it together..." that word lingered in my mouth, 'we'... But there is no we. There will never be we, well as long as Cass and dad are getting married. She leaned closer to me, "I just thought things would go different, I sensed something but, never mind, I just being stupid". I reacted a bit vigorously, "You aren't stupid to me, you're far from that. You're amazing". SHIT! What did I just say?

Once again we sat in silence. She bits her lips nervously. We both a breathing in heavier but trying to hide it so the other doesn't realize, but we both do. We go back to packing away my room. We take out the big things first. Like the desk, mats, chair etc - not the bed, she said she will sleep on a mattress for tonight. We then start packing the smaller stuff, more like excessive amounts of decoration. Finally, we just have to take the clothes. She already had her clothes packed in boxes so we just have to. I had all the boxes needed but then gazed over to look at Grace. She had packed box on top of a box and was carrying it in her arms.

I approach her, calmly so to seem helpful, "Let me help you with that." "Nick, I'm fine, Nick stop! Nick..." Bam a box full of clothes falls on top, knocking me to the floor. I turn my head and I covered in... bras. My face immediately turns into a shade of bright red. I am paralyzed head down. "Think of anything else, " I shriek in my head,  "Grandma's underwear, war, uh scaly feet." I sigh softly a sign of relief, knowing I saved myself from another awkward situation. I quickly get up and look away. Grace stutters, "I, I think I am done here so um. Goodnight." She rushes out hiding her face behind the leftover boxes. "Do you still need help?" I ask clumsy. With one I the room yet is ready to run away she answers with uneasiness, "No, no! You stay there. I'm alright" She leaves before I get to say anything else.

After she leaves as I stare outside the window. I look at the now empty room. It was just me, the bed, and the smell of her roaming around provoking mixed feelings. Is this how life is going to be from now on? Constantly having to push back any unwanted feelings for the sake of this 'new family'. What if I don't want to be part of it? I don't want to put myself in that constant feeling of discomfort, but yet again... If she there, maybe I do want to. "Grace. For the sake of our new life I need to forget about you, but can I or is it a matter of wanting to." The night progresses and my thought wonder impatiently. It's going to be one of those restless nights.