Rescuing Myself (Legend of Zelda)

Chapter 11

"How do I kill this fucking thing?!" I held my hat down as I ran around. Behind me the wolf barked. It was easily larger than a Semi Truck.

"I don't know! You died, or so I thought, last time!"

I screamed (not like a girl....) when the dog threw itself in front of me. I skidded on my heels, trying to stop, resulting in me on my ass staring up at a snarling dog.

"Fucking shit," I grab my bow and an arrow. I pull my arm back and hit the beast in the eye.

He screamed to the sky, keeping his eye shut. Oh nice, that's what I have to do to the other one. Which is exactly what I did. He snarled. Now blind, he used his nose to find out where I was. I swapped my weapon for my sword. I chopped his nose and now he was looking for me, all his senses gone, well all the senses he could use. I take my sword and plunge it into his stomach. Once I drug it to his neck, I pulled out my sword. The wolf fell dead as a door opened, leading to a chest.

"Link you did it!!" Ciela said joyfully.

I put up my blade and smiled back at her. "I know." I chuckled at her excitement.

"Well last time he defeated you..."

"How? He was so easy to kill," I open up the chest. Inside there was a larger, more complex looking key.

"Whoa!" Ciela looks at it with me.

"Yeah.... Whoa," it was purple and had a design on it. The key didn't look normal; it had many different rectangular parts. Some were shorter than others. They all were in different directions.

"That must be the boss key!!"

"Where's the boss?" I sighed.

"Maybe through the door that was opened after the battle!"

Fucking annoying fairy...

I saw that there was indeed another door and crossed over to it. Before I touched it the door just vanished.

"Whoa!" Ciela needs to calm the eff down, I swear to god...

I cautiously step through.

I took it all in; the symbols on the walls the path that led to a door, and no monsters. I took my "key" and looked at the door; it had a complex pattern for the key hole. "The fuck?!" It was certain that the key and the lock didn't match. "this isn't the key," I shake my head, yet I turn it around trying to get it to fit. Dropping my arms to my sides was the sign of defeat.

"C'mon link! Keep trying!" Ciela stands on the lock.

"The only thing I'm going to be trying to do is killing you." I mumbled.

"What was that?" She smiles.

"Nothing," I huff. I tried for five more minutes.

Anger flooded over me. "Fuck this," I threw it at the lock. It bounced back and hit my forehead, knocking me back on my butt. The bouncy ball of a key flew off me and back into the lock, fitting perfectly. I jumped up, angrier than before. "Are you fucking kidding me?!?!" The door slowly drags across the ground, making a stair case visible.