zara. (BWWM)

14.

Zara woke up frustrated at the sound of her alarm piercing in her ears.

I️ have to stay home, she thought.

Mommy's not gonna let you stay home again.

I can't go to school today.
Or ever.

Zara looked down at her phone, angered by the sound of her alarm flooding her ears.

Let it ring so she'll think you slept through your alarm.

I wanna visit Jax later.

He does not want to see you.
Leave him alone.

Never mind then.

Zara couldn't show her face at school for people would tease and laugh and whisper whenever she walked by.

That damn party.

I️ could've just stayed home.

She didn't have to ask Mommy to go.

She didn't have to get in Kelsey's car.
She didn't have to get out of her car either.

She didn't have to a lot of those things that night.

She didn't have to listen to that girl when told she was being summoned.

"I'm waiting for a friend." she could've said.

You know full-well you wouldn't have said anything anyway.

And maybe if Kelsey was by her side at the given time, it wouldn't have happened.

Maybe it wouldn't have happened.

She could've told Kelsey she wanted to go home when asked if she was okay.

But unfortunately, should've, would've, and could've are just words.

They couldn't do anything to help her now.

You could've did a lot of things that night, but guess what?

You didn't.

This is my fault.

This is your fault.

You're so dumb.

Zara sat upright, wincing at the sound of her creaking bed.

Distracted by her thoughts, she stopped her alarm.

I️ told you to stay in bed.
You didn't want to listen.

She dragged herself out of bed, immediately sensing a crippling disconnect between she and her comfort.

Her temporary comfort.

Temporary relief.

She plodded out of her dark room, down the hallway and into her bathroom.

Zara entered her bedroom wrapped in her red and yellow towel, hearing her flip flops squeak due to her wet feet.