moon's chosen

Eight | Weakling

"Alpha no..." I struggled through laboured breaths. My nails transformed and I trying scratching in warning.

"You can't-" I gasped as his lips touched the skin on my neck. Waking a sizzling pleasure, "dishonour me. My mate."

I gasped as his hands wandered. "I've saved myself all these years for him... Please leave," yet my body had started clinging to him.

"Don't do this," I took his face between my hands. The tears had clouded me and I could clearly see him.

Confusion clouded my features as the image was not what I expected.

"Haydn?"

He looked shocked, confused. "What's going on?" I was straddling him. I pulled away, and sat at the edge of the bed, it was that nightmare again.

I pulled at my hair, what I had to understand is why was I on him? "I'm sorry." I mumbled and tugged harder.

"Your heat is coming soon." he spoke. My eyes grew wide and I wondered how he knew.

"What?" I looked over at him.

"You were clinging to me the way a female does if she wants pups. You did it in your sleep."

I kept eye contact, "I don't want pups."

"I do, however, have a duty to the pack so it will happen eventually. But not soon." it's best he knows this now than later. We had to be honest with each other. I noticed that we'd strangely grown apart.

My mind kept on going back to the time when the war came to an end, to when he took me in his arms and we both took each other in. Lost ourselves in what our instinct wanted from us.

All this changed when he called me Luna, and I could argue that it's partially my fault.

Because here I was, within our apartment clinging to the title of Luna because I did not want to let go of violence.

"I respect that."

I sighed. Where was the fire, the argument about wanting to have me pregnant as soon as I say please? Where was the lack of control, the sexual tension that had us ready to take each other in front of everyone.

I wanted it all. The drama. Just like in the stories.

"H-Haydn..."i started. I started into his eyes. "Did I talk in my sleep?"

He nodded.

I bit my lip, and thought back to what I remembered. "What did I say?" I swallowed hard.

"Things that should have been spoken when you were awake." he had a hard look on his face. I swallowed hard, and clenched my fists wishing I could undo it all.

My mouth ran dry, I finally took notice of the bruise on his neck. My hand flew to my own, "did I do that?"

He nodded.

I looked at my lap. "I'm sorry." I mumbled.

I turned and looked at him again and reached over to touch the bruises. Making contact with him had me buzzing, I shuffled back to the centre and continued touching him.

Familiarising my self with his skin, I cupped his face in my hands and looked into his eyes. They were different, they were swirling with an emotion I hadn't thought I would see so soon. He knew what my former Alpha did to me, I placed my forehead onto his and shut my eyes.

"Forgive me for being weak."

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me impossibly close. A tear wore its path down my cheek as I laid my head onto his shoulder. "Is that why you wanted to leave so soon?"

"I was afraid I'd go through my heat with him again..." I mumbled into his shoulder. "I have faith in the Moon that she put us together. I would have come regardless..." I wrapped my arms around him.

"I worried for so long, thought I wouldn't have a mate for sure if this happened. Someone to save me, I realised on that day that only I could save myself." a smile started showing.

"and then I met you."

"I'm glad I met you," he said. His hands ran through my hair as be Sat like that for what felt like forever.

The kind of forever that has you wishing it won't end. This was my chosen, I know I can't trust him.

"When the time comes, do what needs to be done." I told him

I felt him tense, "Katinka. I can't."

I pulled away. Why couldn't he?

My mind started buzzing, ideas started swirling. Of course, I was damaged. But he wasn't the pure one between us...

"Why?"

"You need to heal-"

"But I'm asking you to help me! I'm asking you to stop making me associate my heat with that man." my chest tightened. My throat tightened. "Do you know how long I waited for you?"

I remember all the reasons I had to settle, to take on human antics. I remember considering spending a meaningless night. Having someone be at my side as a love became something I craved. "I'm asking you to help me. Not as my chosen. As a female who is going to be my Alpha." I crawled over to him. Took his face in my hands as desperation grew.

His eyes were wetter than usual, "I have something to mourn for." I almost couldn't recognise myself.

I could feel myself shaking, "due your duty as Alpha." I whispered.

Cheek to cheek, our tears mingled. "I don't want to think of him when it comes. It's meant for you... Take it."