Chapter 14: bound to heart

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I calmed down a lot more in the time it took for them to get here. I think I was overreacting. But I don't know, I end up saying that a lot after experiencing emotions in a reasonable way. Chances were: I would actually be safe tonight. I was thinking if The Man with Long Teeth came after us three it would be one of the worst things that's happened to me in a while, and that was saying a lot. Trust me. But the odds were up against that. From what I knew, he never strikes a group. 

Then again, I sure didn't know much. 

I traced my fingers over the petals of the dried, dead flowers I kept in jars in my room. My mother's words of how she wished I threw them away rang in my head. She wasn't anywhere near me to tell me otherwise now. I bet she missed me so much. I ran away from her a couple months ago. Well, I ran away from her and a few other things. But I think that nobody can actually run from anything when they're alive if you really think about it. I ran from my mother but there she was, a translucent memory of her standing in my room telling me to throw the dead flowers away--her words affecting me just as they would if she was really there.

I could only truly part with anything by loosing the memories.

At least my dad's Huntington's disease had one thing going for him.

I laughed a little, and then nearly broke down crying again.

I was so weak.

There was a knock at my door. Nelly was barking. I went to answer it. I needed to be strong.

By now the sun had gone down and Kenzie, Jaymie, and I were all sitting on the reclining chairs in my living room. We were trying to watch the movie "Super Dark Times" but the treble was kinda low on our sound system and it was hard to hear the voices. Oh well.

"Fucking hell Katy, who does she think she is? I'm not after your goddamn boyfriend you bitch!"

"Kenzie what the fuck are you talking about," Jaymie asked her.

"Her boyfriend and I used to be friends in elementary school and I was talking to him just last week. I had a conversation with him, I didn't suck his dick. God." 

"Die," I said.

"Thanks Mary." I briefly wondered if Kenzie would ever date someone else anytime soon after what had happened to her last significant other. Maybe not. Probably not. If she did I probably wouldn't let her anyways considering her bad luck. Or maybe that was a dick move. 

"Why does this bullshit always happen to me," Kenzie sighed, slumping down in her seat, then perking up again when she got a notification.

"Kenzie you're beautiful and helpless like a dying star. I'm not sure if the odds will ever be in your favor. Hopefully when you die your core is scattered into space and begins again better than this time around," I huffed.

"I wonder what I'd be like in another life."

"Wouldn't it be funny if Kenzie was doomed for an infinite string of bad luck no matter what?"

"Ha yeah I guess that would be kind of funny, Jaymie."

"I need new friends," Kenzie sighed again. 

"Okay I'm bored and Kenzie's whining is annoying me. Lets go outside or something," Jaymie said, putting her flannel back on. 

"Hey! Bitch! But yeah we should do sparklers now. Look for your lighter, Mary."

"I don't need to look for it. You know I keep that motha fuckin' thang on me."

"Never say that again please," Jaymie told me.

Us three girls sat on the creaky stairs to get our shoes on. Tonight there was a waning crescent moon. Kenzie was struggling to turn on my lighter. The thought about us never coming back sat in the back of my head. 

My street was empty and the streetlights didn't shine on anything but parked cars and three dumbasses. I liked the sound of vehicles driving by on nearby roads as our voices echoed into the night. Soon enough I heard the fuzzy sound of a sparkler starting behind me, and I joined it to the one in my hand to be lit. Once all of ours were burning we ran down to the end of my street holding them high in the air. Tonight there was a waning crescent moon but I felt anything but empty.

There was a whole lot going on my heart in that moment.

When the sparklers faded out so did we, walking back to my house with ragged breaths and exhausted happiness. It was a good feeling. I loved Kenzie and Jaymie both very much just then. I mean, I always did but I just felt more connected than usual. It was a good feeling.

"Mary?" It was Kenzie's voice.

"Yeah?"

"Uh, is your uncle home?" Her eyes kept glancing behind me.

"No, how come you're asking?"

"I just--that man in your yard doesn't look like your dad."

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