road to recovery • wolfstar

0.07

Charley had been parked up front and hadn't been used since the day Sirius bought it (he didn't want to scratch it, DON'T JUDGE HIM) so you could only imagine how excited he would be when he finally could, except he wasn't. He felt guilty. So fucking guilty.

Their house door had shut behind him and Remus but still not a single word had been exchanged since Sirius threw away the blade. Neither of them had breakfast inside as it was the tension was still thick in the air. Though no proper finalisation was made, they both knew they were probably going to stop at a cafè or McDonalds. Sirius got in to the driver's seat and Remus got the one right next to that.
"This is going to be fucking fun, eh?" Sirius said as he looked behind him, cringing too hard. It was probably the wrongest thing to say at the wrongest time, fucking great days! He hoped every problem would just float away, the broken pieces would just weld back together, he would be able to fix stuff. But of course, life was never that good.
"Yeah, totally." Remus chuckled with absolutely no humour in his voice. He should've just gotten up when Sirius entered and pushed away his own damn feelings so he could get on with the day perfectly fine. He felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he pulled it out to examine his texts.
James: lily made a victoria sponge and it's fckin amazing, want some?

Remus: fckin? really? we can't anyway, sirius and i are leaving for a road trip. he didn't tell you about it?

James: WHAT?! NO, HE DIDNT! THE PRICK

Remus: enjoy your victoria sponge

Remus tucked his phone back in his pocket and breathed heavily out of his nose. The were just turning away from the corner shop and Remus saw the same decaying, wooden post that Thomas was leaning on. He turned away quickly before the memories blinded him.
"Where... where are we even going?" Remus asked after he saw Sirius looking slightly confused. It was true that they barely discussed any of it (Remus just practically packed his whole wardrobe and toiletries) but Remus forgot how Sirius always had a tendency to wing things.
"I.... don't really know. We're going all over, I guess. We'll follow the signs or some shit." Sirius turned the corner to the lines of cafes and food shops. Sirius was driving slowly through the shops, trying to find either the most humble one, or the most boisterous but delicate one.

"Do you want to go to The Coffee Bean?" Sirius smirked at Remus and he knew why. The Coffee Bean was where Remus fainted because he saw his favourite author, J.K Rowling. She'd written books all about a fantasy world in which a boy called Henry Fawner is famous in, though he doesn't know it at the beginning because the world he is in isn't involved in the world of wizards and witches... and because his aunt and uncle avoid and neglect him, but that's the sad stuff and we try to avoid that.
"Maybe I'll see Jo again." Remus shrugged, knowing it wasn't a very funny joke. Sirius still smiled though, trying to break the tension that was growing like ivy in the past couple of seconds. He decided to try and make things normal, but still subtly hinting that he's not alone and always had someone to talk to.
"Come on then." Sirius parked the car up in front of the shop and got out, chewing on his lip slightly. In the good old days when they were carefree and innocent, they would always come to this place when it was the holidays and they didn't have anything to do and it soon became their favourite hangout space, and Remus' favourite place in the whole after that special day where he nearly cracked his skull open. Perhaps things weren't supposed to stay like that, maybe it was so they could grow as people and learn to mature a bit. No one would have ever thought that James would grow up, now look at him: a father.

The Coffee Bean hadn't changed much, except they added a lot more greenery. A whole array of somewhat satisfyingly sluggish coloured teas were crammed on to shelves in neat rows. Setting the atmosphere, the rich fragrance of coffee filled the room like a heavy drink. In the far corner, the seat that J.K Rowling sat in had a beautiful golden plaque, the words 'Jo's Seat' engraved on to it, was plastered on the wall behind. It was one of those seats that weren't allowed to be sat it, but of course, if Miss Rowling was ever to visit again, she would sit in that very chair.
"Here ya go." Sirius pulled out a chair for Remus and he nodded in thanks. It was always like this, almost as if Sirius knew that one day it was going to hurt, so he did every single nice act he could to Remus just hoping he could wipe it away. The last thing he wanted was someone who meant as much to him as Remus does was to get hurt and be trapped in their own hell bubble.
"I know exactly what you want." Sirius grinned. All the time, Remus ordered the exact same thing: a hot chocolate with whipped cream and a toasted marshmallow to finish.
"Pfft, no you don't. Nobody remembers details like that." What Remus actually meant was that nobody pays attention to any details about him. He was so boringly average, but at the same time, he was alien.
"I do, remember that time you went on a date with that girl in Hufflepuff?" Sirius asked. Remus wondered what this was getting to.

"Yes..."

"And you hated it so you came back ten minutes later?" Remus looked down. It would be surprising if he forgot. The girl was nice and all, but he just didn't feel anything that would perhaps help deepen the relationship. He knew he shouldn't have, but he said he had to leave after barely any time at all.
"Ok, so yeah, you remember that, but you also had to get ready for that date. Before you left, I scrutinised you and now I know the amount of freckles you have on your face: 15." Sirius quoted proudly. Remus smiled a little shyly, and Sirius put his hand up a bit to summon a waiter. She waddled over, her white blonde spilling around her waist and a note pad in her pudgy hand. She was very pretty and seemed to have that nice sort of nature emitting off her.
"Hiya, gentlemen. What would you like today?" She smiled dazzlingly and Sirius smiled, a little confusedly, back.
"Umm, a strong black coffee and a hot chocolate with whipped cream and a marshmallow. I'd also a piece of toast." Sirius looked at Remus expectantly.
"Yeah, and a croissant."
"Ok... be with you in a few." The girl walked back to the counter where the drinks were being made and handed a man the sheet of paper.

The waitress came back with the drinks and a plate, holding both the croissant and piece if toast. Jam was supplied in little jars while the butter was in the regular plastic containers. She also had a small, torn piece if paper which she slid towards Sirius. A whole row of numbers and a smiley face was scribbled on to it.
"Yeah, thanks." Sirius said nervously. The sad thing is that he would never call her. She walked away with a triumphant smile on her face.
"Try and call her while I'm asleep, the last thing I want to hear is her giggling." Remus said slightly icily. He didn't know exactly why, but a twinge of annoyance found it's way running through his veins.
"Who said I'm calling her? I just don't want to tell her that I'm not interested. She'll forget soon enough." Sirius reasoned, chuckling at Remus. Suddenly, the annoyance left like a pissed off neighbour.

oh my fucking days, it's been like a week since i last updated and i'm so sorry. things are shit and a break up happened that made me feel like a deflated balloon, i ain't talkin bout david and liza. no, i'm talking about jackson and dylan. i literally just found out about them and now they broke up. remember i even talked about them in a previous a/n! and i said i loved them! i think it was because jackson got drunk and assaulted his family which really isn't cool, but.... just ugh, did he really have to get drunk? the dangers of alcohol are real, kids.
see you next millennium.