What Hurts The Most (Jeff Hardy FF)

Chapter Eight

I opened my eyes and took in my surroundings. I was still in Lita and Matt's locker room. I realized that I must have fallen asleep. I heard the sound of hushed talking by the door. I could see Lita standing in the doorway. I listed to see if I could make out what the were saying.

"You need to give her some space." Lita said blocking the door.

"I just want to talk to her." The other voice said. It was Jeff.

"Not right now, I think you've done enough." She told him moving closer to the doorway.

"I just wanna tell her I'm sorry, I pushed way too much on her too fast." He told her still trying to get in the door. He sounded really upset.

"I know how you get Jeff, but she isn't ready for that. She just started here and you just had to go and do what you always do. You had to push. I love you, but you went to far." Lita said getting upset.

"I just want her to know I'm sorry." He said quietly. Now I felt bad for pushing him away.

"You can tell her when she has had time to calm down. She isn't the easiest person to get to open up. She will come to you when she's ready." She tried to close the door, but Jeff stopped her.

"Just give me 5 minutes, that's all I want." He pleaded with the red head.

"No, we warned you the day we started training her not to push and look at what you did, you pushed. I get that you like her but it is way too much too fast for her." Lita said defending me. They knew since the day at the gym?

"How do you know what's too much for her?" Jeff asked getting defensive.

"Because I know that girl better than you think. She trusts me and I tend to keep it that way. So you need to back off and let me handle this. If you keep pushing like this she will walk away from you forever." Lita told him there was a silence that fell upon them.

"I just don't know why I can't talk to her." Jeff said being stubborn. Lita let out a frustrated sigh. I decided to let her know I was awake which I shouldn't have done.

"Lita? Is everything okay?" I asked softly. She turned her head towards me and Jeff budged through the door. I tensed up when I saw him.

"Listen Kailee, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to act like that. I know I can come on a bit strong, but I just wanted to let you know how I felt." Jeff said trying to walk over to me, but Lita stopped him. I could feel his eyes on me as I stared at the floor.

"Just please don't shut me out, we were getting along so well and I know we can still be friends." Jeff pleaded with me trying to get around Lita.

"I just need a little space dude. I feel like I'm suffocating. I'm 19 and just started in this business. I thought we were just friends. I'm sorry if I did something to make you feel otherwise but that's all we are: just friends. And I need you to respect that." I said finally looking at him. It hurt me to say that, but I needed to. Lita understood why. That's why she was so protective of me. She knew of the dark things from my past that made me this way. Jeff didn't say anything he just nodded his head acknowledging what I had said.

"Okay that's enough. Time to go." Lita told him pushing him towards the door. He took one more look at me before he left. Once the door was closed I let out a shaky breath. Lita walked over and sat by me.

"How you doing, hun?" She asked looking at me. I met her gaze.

"Wish I knew" I told her moving my gaze to my lap where I was fiddling with my fingers.

"I know it's hard to trust after what happened, but Jeff isn't like that. He just has a compulsive need to make his feelings known and when he feels something he just gets so wound up. He isn't doing this to mess with you. It's just who he is." Lita explained I looked at her my eyes glassy with tears.

"I just don't know who I can trust, ya know. I have this nagging voice that keeps telling me that everyone is gonna do what Ethan did." I told her as a tear fell. Thinking about Ethan hurt me in a way that no one understood.

"Listen to me, Ethan was an ass to you. And what he did is so sick that he shouldn't ever be aloud to be happy again. Look at what he did to you. You are the sweetest person ever and he broke that. Not everyone is him. I mean Matt isn't like that is he? There are still good people out there you just gotta find em." Lita said getting a bit upset talking about him. She knew how hard it was for me to talk about. She was the first person I ever told about Ethan.

"I know that, it's just hard to grasp that not everyone is gonna do what he did. I just wish I could forget about him." I told her putting my head in my hands. Lita started rubbing my back.

"I kinda wanna kill him." Lita suddenly said. I softly chuckled at her.

"You know the last words he said to me still ring through my head." I told her a sad look on my face.

"What were his last words?" She asked never having heard this part of the story.

"He said 'you really think anyone will ever love you? You deserve to die alone. You are last person anyone would ever wanna be with' and then he walked away." I told her as another tear fell.

"I really am gonna kill him if I ever see him." She told me. I honestly wish I had never met him. I wish I had never met the man that broke my soul. I was about to say more when the door opened again. I tensed thinking it was Jeff but relaxed when I saw Matt. He looked at the scene in front of him with sad eyes before he spoke.

"You girls ready to go the next town?"