An Alpha's Jealousy (Narry Storan) (Book One)

Chapter Thirteen: Part Two

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"Liam and I are still trying to interact when we can, but we usually have limited time together," Harry shakes his head as he returns from his memories. "Still, I'm glad we made up and are on good terms."

Emerald eyes observe the petite man's surroundings as wisps of memories fade from focus. The lamp posts are lit and illuminating the park cloaked in black shadows, and the sky is a black ominous void whose only light source is the full moon, which is even veiled behind gray clouds.

As Harry surveys the park, his concentration is captured by the warm limb around his shoulders.

"I enjoy these times with Niall," Harry leans into Niall's side as he internally lists the qualities he adores about the blonde haired male. "I love the vulnerability Niall demonstrates when he reminisces. I love how he speaks highly of Liam and Zayn. I love the kindness he shows only to those special enough to witness it, and I especially love the romantic side that lays dormant behind his savage personality."

"But," The train of thoughts abruptly switches tracks as Harry analyzes his emotions, " do I love Niall? If I do, why? Why do I love Niall? Do I love him because he's shown himself to be a fantastic partner? Do I love Niall because I trust him, even though he's an Alpha, a being I should be weary of? Do I love Niall because I love him and all he is?"

Vibrant emerald eyes wither into dead flowers as they stare at a swing set, "I know how I feel. I know the emotions I've experienced these past weeks, but I don't know what they mean. When we're together, it's like I'm on a cloud floating high up to the sky. There's no fear. There's no insecurity. There's just joy and contentment. There's just the feeling of never wanting to depart."

"And," Harry continues to reflect, "when we're apart, it's like a part of me is missing. It's a puzzle half-complete. It's a wolf with only two legs. It's like I'm not whole when he's away from me. It's like I'm not me, not the real me, when he's gone."

"But," His thoughts halt in their steps as Harry realizes his lack of identity, "who exactly am I? Ever since my birthday, I haven't been able to answer that question. I'm not the Harry before: the only openly gay kid in Holmes Chapel. But, I can't call myself Harry the wolf, either. So, who am I? Am I a combination of the two? Am I some thing else entirely? Who am I?"

"Am I Harry, Niall's friend?" Emerald eyes crawl back to Niall, whose languid posture demonstrates his obliviousness regarding Harry's inner turmoil, as Harry focuses on their relationship. "Am I Harry, Niall's lover? Who am I? Who am I to myself, and, most importantly, who am I to Niall?"

"What are we, Niall?" The frank question suddenly leaps off Harry's lips before the male can revise it to sound, well, not as accusatory as it does.

"What?" The evident change in Harry's mood yanks blue eyes from the sky towards Harry's face as the blonde's brown eyebrows furrow. "What do you mean, Harry?"

"I mean," Harry slowly clarifies as his brain forms his next sentence, "what is our relationship? Are we acquaintances? Are we friends? Are we lovers?"

"    No,"    Niall's voice is frosty as he jerks his arm from Harry's suddenly cold shoulders. "We are definitely    not    lovers, and we    never    will be lovers. Do you understand that, Styles?    Never.    "

The adverse reaction is a flaming arrow to Harry's heart, and the more the taller male emphasizes his revulsion, the more arrows pierce Harry's bleeding heart.

Emerald eyes swim with unshed tears as Harry forces his shaking body to still and compels the fury, building beneath his skin, to control his next actions, "Oh, so it's back to Styles, is it, Horan? Well, that's bloody    fine     by me! I ask one measly question, and you go and act like the utter prat you are! I should have known, honestly. Once a prick,    always    a prick. You probably don't even know how to really act like a decent person! This whole time has just been some façade you've humored yourself with!"