Patience

Twenty-seven

Two Weeks Later

Ever since I left Axl and showed up at Slash's, I've been happy. I felt like I was over Axl after just a few days. In those few days I screamed, I cried, and I threw things and put a hole in Slash's wall, but Slash didn't seem to mind. He seemed to understand.

Then, it hit me. I didn't need Axl. He wasn't any good. I only needed myself. And after that realization, I decided that I was ready to go out and have a good time for the first time in a while.

I started going out clubbing every night. I've brought several different guys home within that time and of course, I've had plenty of sex. Once again, Slash didn't seem to mind because he brings a girl home every now and then, too. Slash just keeps to himself, as do I.

I put stepped into my heels and slipped a jacket on. I was about to go out, but Slash stopped me.

"Lucy," Slash said, getting my attention, "Please be careful." That was the first time he had really stopped me before one of my little benders. We had this unspoken, mutual agreement in which we just did our own things, but shared a common space.

I nodded. "I will. I'll probably just have a few drinks and bring another guy home," I said with a shrug.

"Just watch out. There are weirdos," Slash said.

"Not as weird as you," I said, tapping Slash on the nose and leaving the house. Slash just kind of stood there, unsure of how to act. I couldn't blame him, that was a bit weird of me.

I had called a cab and took it to the best club in town, right on sunset strip. I went inside and immediately ordered a drink. One drink turned into two, and three, and then a lot of flirting with a lot of men.

Everything was becoming a blur at this point. When I turned my head, the room took a second to turn with me. Eventually, after flirting with this guy and allowing him to buy me a couple of drinks, I led him out to the dance floor. I began grinding on him, though it was hard, given how crowded it was. I turned around to face him, but bumped into someone in the process. I turned around again to apologize, but then I saw who it was.

"Lucy," Axl said. He looked shocked to see me. He even seemed a little sad. I don't care, I thought. His loss.

"No. Get away. I don't wanna see you," I said, slurring my words. At that point, the man I had brought to dance with me had wondered off. 

"Lucy, let me take you home, or at least back to wherever you're staying," Axl offered.

"No, stay away. I don't want to be here with you," I said, backing away.

Then, I turned around and tapped the guy who was nearest to me on the arm. "Hey, wanna go back to my place?" I asked him, keeping eye contact with Axl the entire time.

The guy agreed and I dragged him out, shooting a dirty look at Axl on the way out.

"Well, you're back early," Slash said as I stumbled into the door with the random guy, but then I stopped.

"Oh, you're drunk and have a guy. Well, I'll be down here," Slash said walking away.

"Ignore him," I told the guy who's name I didn't know.

I dragged him upstairs and took him into the guest room that Slash was letting me stay in. I shut the door, pushed the guy against the wall, and started making out with him. He then picked me up, carried me over to the bed, and sat me down. He began to take his shirt off, then mine, when there was a knock at the door.

"What?" I asked, pulling my shirt back down.

"Sorry to interrupt, but you have company downstairs, Lucy," Slash said, cracking the door open so I could hear his voice.

I stood up. "I'm sorry, I'll be back," I said to my hookup, and I left the room.

"Who the hell wants to see me this late?" I asked, slurring the question.

Slash helped me down the stairs, and that's when I saw Axl. I froze.

"No. I'm not doing this," I said and I tried to turn and go back upstairs, but Slash blocked me.

"Just listen to what he has to say," Slash said. He picked me up, carried me the rest of the way down the steps, and set me in front of Axl.

"What?" I asked, crossing my arms.

"Your bruise is gone," Axl quietly pointed out. He started to reach for my face to touch it, but stopped himself. He shoved his hands into his pockets.

"Yeah, no shit. Get to the point," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Lucy, I'm sorry. Will you come home and he with me? This life isn't like you," Axl said.

"How would you know what's like me?" I asked, pointing at him so violently I almost fell over.

"Is that guy here?" Axl asked.

"Yes, and you're wasting my time," I informed him.

"Well, if you don't want to come back, I guess we should at least properly break up, you know," Axl shrugged sadly.

Oh, yeah. I guess we didn't officially do that. I must have been sobering up because in that moment, seeing the look on his face, I felt my heart drop. This must be what real heartache feels like, I thought. Axl really didn't deserve to have me back, but I'm not sure if I can imagine a life without him. So far, a life without him has led to the absolute wreck that I am right now.

After thinking to myself for a few moments, I finally spoke up.

"Wait here," I said, walking back upstairs.

I entered my room and pointed at the doorway. "Out," I said, pointing to the door behind me with my thumb.

After I got the guy to leave, I walked back up to Axl and teared up. I wanted to say something. I don't know whether I want to scream or cry, but instead I wrapped my arms around his waist and embraced him. He squeezed me tight.

"I'm sorry, lovely Lucy. I shouldn't have done what I did. I want you to know that I am going to change for you," Axl told me.

In that very moment, the stars had aligned. I missed the warm, comforting feeling of having Axl be mine. I knew exactly how I felt.

"Axl," I said, letting go of him.

"Yes?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, lovely Lucy."