I wanted to spend more time on this, but I wanted to upload this on time. I hope I can edit it later.
Almost 2,000 words of pure angst, enjoy! (Warnings: Character Death, Mentions of Mental Health Conditions, Mild Language)
*Can be read as either a sequel to To Be Bulletproof or a stand-alone oneshot.
Summary: In which Jimin may not be bulletproof, but he sure is invincible as long as he has Jungkook.
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The nagging feeling in his heart was becoming harder and harder to ignore. The constant feeling of anxiety is oppressive and suffocating. Too many days Jimin finds himself curled on the floor, terrified of the world around him. Terrified of the world inside his head. The sweet words whispered in his ear, the soft kisses pressed to his face do little to soothe his aching and bleeding heart. He is damaged beyond repair. He feels dead and the worst of it hasn't even happened, yet.
Desperate and lost, Jungkook is forced to watch from the sidelines. Forced to watch the love of his life spiral into a pit of despair, self-hatred and pain. The usually warm heart now cold to the touch as Jimin cowers from Jungkook's touch. Tears stream down Jungkook's face, hand hanging awkwardly in the air. Confused and unsure. He is simply a bystander.
After that fateful day in the dorms, the day etched into Jungkook's mind forever, Jungkook can't leave Jimin alone. The day when a single comment single-handedly ruined Jimin. The perfect recipe of words to destroy the shred of self-confidence Jimin had left. That one comment that managed to destroy everything he had worked so hard for; himself.
It broke him.
The fear of the effects of Jimin's self-hatred too strong to ignore. Jungkook could never leave Jimin alone, in silence only for him to fall into the chaos of his mind. Jimin could always find a way to believe the voices inside his head over the voices screaming his name, too far away to be heard. The voices hidden by the walls protecting his fragile heart and soul. Jimin's drifting away and Jungkook can only watch; all he can do is watch.
But he hasn't lost him yet.
——
Practicing is hard. The voices are even harder to ignore. When the world gets too much for Jimin, all he ever wants is to be embraced by his lover, his heart, his soul; Jungkook. But he ignores his desires, thoughts and mind polluted by the voices in his head. He pushes through the practice, avoiding the one person who cares the most.
The show must go on.
——
Jungkook's proud.
As he watches the blonde-haired beauty lose himself to the music in front of him, Jungkook can only feel proud of him. The sheer strength and tenacity it took for Jimin to come with them. The fear gripping Jimin's heart and mind were able to be ignored as Jimin reluctantly followed them to Fort Worth for their concert.
He glances around, his hyungs sharing similar feelings. Their faces only show adoration and pride for their beloved member.
The member whose kindness is unmatched, whose smile lights up the entire room. With a sweet laughter to cheer up your darkest days. Whose hand is always outstretched, ready to catch you when you fall. Soft words, soothing voice; whispering words of encouragement. An uncanny strength, ready to carry you when you fail. Wide, observing eyes; he always knows. The most beautiful, selfless person, the one who is strong beyond belief. The other members can only stare.
