Blood

Chapter Eight: My Facade

I lay there, trying to think of something that I could say to Zev. He hasn't budged an inch since he asked me about marking and I subsequently froze. His soft breath on my neck driving my wolf mad, she wants his mark. She wants me to open up to our mate. I don't, I really do not want to have to tell Zev about my condition.

"I'm not ready yet," is all I manage to say. While it's not a lie, it's not the whole truth. He would just have to be happy with my reasons for now.

Abruptly his arms collapse, his head dropping away from my neck. The air is knocked out of my lungs from the sudden impact. I take steady, shallow breaths as I wait for him to move. When he finally does, he moves the blanket away from me and then pulls down the shoulder of my sweater. He lightly kisses my shoulder and then bites me. Not marking, he just bites me out of nowhere. I gasp and try to not scream from the inexplicable pain.

I struggle against Zev, trying to push him away. In response, he bites down harder. I howl in pain. My eyes glow as my wolf launches her consciousness forward wanting to protect me from the feeling. My body shakes and I try repeatedly to get away from Zev. By some miracle, he pulls away and sits up. His eyes are glowing and I recognize the regret in his wolf's eyes.

"I am sorry I was unable to stop him sooner," he mourns.

"Why did he do that?" I ask, on the verge on tears, a combination of my confusion and pain.

"He keeps thinking you will try and reject him again," he says.

"Thank you," I mumble, wiping at my eyes.

"For what?" He asks, cocking his head to the side.

"For stopping him," I say, covering my eyes with my arms.

"I should have protected you sooner," he says, downcast.

"You couldn't have felt my pain," I sooth, reaching out to him. He leans his head into my hands and I slowly sit up. "Had you, or even him, felt that, I'm sure that you'd have stopped him, that he'd have stopped."

"He is angry. He wants me to let go of control," he says.

I pull him into me and lightly kiss him. His eyes look glazed over and I say, "It's okay now."

He softly nods and then fades away, returning control to Zev. The anger quickly grows in him and I drop my arms. As he sits there glaring at me I slowly back away.

"You kissed my wolf," he accuses.

"What of it?" I ask, looking away from him. He growls at me so I look back at him and snap, "He saved me from you Zev. What do you want me to do? Roll over and pretend you didn't just cause me unimaginable pain?"

"I can't keep up with you," he mutters before vacating the room. He never comes back. I curl up into myself and drift to sleep.

"Sweety, is that you?" My mother calls out.

"Yes mom," I say walking over to her. I give her a hug and ask, "How are you feeling?"

She smiles weakly and says, "As best I can Casmoke."

I nod as I see her eyes well up. She must be remembering him. I take the spoon she's holding from her and finish the preparations for dinner myself, sending her to go lay down. Once I've finished I go up to her room and gently pull her out of bed. She's doing her best to act like she's okay. But to me it's all too apparent, I can tell because I'm doing the same exact thing. My facade is just harder to crack than hers is.

We eat in silence, and I catch her looking longingly at our third chair. His chair. Watching my mother go through this pain, I blame him. Even though I also dearly miss him, I blame him for her misery. I've already decided that I never want to find my mate. I know he'll one day find me, but I will escape him, what other choice do I have?