Karin: The Demon Sleeping Within

Chapter 6: Loathe Me

I grazed the water with my fingertips as I stared at my reflection.

The moon shined brilliantly over the lake, casting a light over my reflection. I lifted my hand from the water and allowed for the image to refocus and unwaver. For a brief moment, for a second, I felt my hands gripping the hoodie, threatening to tear it off. Something had come over me. As I stared at myself through the water's mirror, I began to want more; to see more. I wanted to look through the water and to see my face, and all of it. My forest green eyes and my wavy blond hair that I would always cover by the cloak that was my hoodie.

At first, it used to be a defense technique I had developed so I wouldn't make eye contact with any of the hoarse commoners, but now it was merely second nature. Even out here, in the middle of the forest, my sanctity, away from the city, I continued the behavior. It was something I would always do now. I didn't think that would change, not any time soon anyway.

I squinted my eyes as I continued to look at my doppelganger, tilting my head, I watched her do the same, mimicking me. I smiled, and then she smiled.

I then frowned, seeing her do the same. Though forged, it looked quite real, quite genuine, as if those lips were used to forming that shape.

"You don't look so bad..." I voiced, my eyes dazed. "Why are people afraid of you?"

Perhaps because you have a frightening aura?

I heard her voice in my head. Satania.

I felt my heart race in my chest, feeling her sudden presence. She felt so close, like she was right next to me, though probably a mile away. A minuscule smile had formed on my lips.

***

Satania's P.O.V.

What a curious creature...

***

Karin's P.O.V.

"I've been looking for you..." My smile widened due to my satisfaction of completing my goal.

"I know," she voiced. She then showed herself, sitting down beside me. "But, why?"

The rabbit beside me nodded his head in my direction before scampering off, leaving me to talk with her alone.

I turned my head to look at Satania. In all honesty, I didn't know why. Maybe it was because I felt like we could relate somehow? In our loneliness? Maybe it's because, when I first saw her, my heart began to race? Or maybe it was her eyes, those eyes that had me captivated? Perhaps there was not just one answer as to why I was here with her now. What mattered was that I chose to come here, and I felt a dire need to.

"I don't know." I whispered, staring into the soles of her golden eyes. So beautiful. So angelic.

And, that was the honest truth.

I fixated my eyes back towards the water, though this time, I could see a deceptively beautiful demon interrupt the picture. She wore a curious smile.

Before she spoke, she brushed the water with her fingertips, blurring the image.

"You feel drawn to me," she had concluded.

I didn't know what to say. But, if that were to be true, would I have admitted that?

But, that would have only proven the town's folks to be right.

I really am a monster.

"She's acting like you're being drawn to her, when it's a two-way street."

The tiny voice that was in the back of my head became louder this time. It was as if my sub-conscience was split into two. Had I just not recognized this voice earlier? Why was it being shown now?

I shook my head, though hesitantly. There was an evident doubt in my action. Deep down, as truly frightening yet exciting as it was to be in such a position, to be with the princess of all the rest, I couldn't bring myself to accept it- to accept my fate. But, why? Why did it have to be her?

Interrupting my thoughts, I felt her warm breath close to my ear. She whispered to me.

"To be drawn to me is to be drawn to death... do you want to die?"

My eyes widened, her breath sending me into a state both in fear and comfort. The question was so provoking; so obscure.

My next words came out on their own, digging up a truth deep down within me, connecting with my soul.

"The world might be better off if I had died..." The town-folks surely seem to think that, though I never did anything to actually give them a reason to despise me.

The demon's blue flames slowly began to surface. That blue light... one touch would kill.

And, we were dangerously close.

"Do you really think that low of yourself?" Her voice became intimidating and filled with something else entirely, curiosity. "How is your life worth less than theirs?"

How was my life worth less..? Than theirs..?

Well... they weren't the ones deemed cursed.

"Because, I'm sitting here next to the infamous demon of the underworld. I am looking straight into the eyes of a remorseless killer, her flames a death sentence, yet... something isn't connecting. I should be frightened... only frightened, but that's not how I feel."

Her golden eyes seemed dilated as they moved back and forth, examining me in full attention. I wanted to touch her- to lock my hand with hers. I wanted to feel her skin. Would it be as soft as it appeared? Or would it feel old and rotten like a dying apple? I wanted to know, but I resisted the urge. After all, those flames.

Heat rose to my cheeks. "I feel-"

"Resentment." She pushed herself back, the wind blowing my hair back with her motion. Her flames grew. "I want you to watch closely."

There was a brilliant flower, a white hibiscus, healthy and blossomed, that was, until Satania pinched the stem of the plant between her fingers. The flower darkened, the petals becoming droopy. Seconds later, the flower had withered before vanishing into dust.

I lightly gasped, feeling my heart cramp in my chest.

"Living is hard. I watch you creatures of all forms work so hard just to keep your heart beating and your blood pumping. You work so hard to live... but so easily will you die."

As her flames grew larger and larger, the dirt underneath her darkened, as if burning under her.

"You should resent me. Loathe me. I don't want to see you ever again!" Her voice had startled me. So suddenly, she was outraged, but I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe her words. If that was true, why was she with me now? "I will kill you! You hear me?! And, I wouldn't think any second more over it!"

"Then why haven't you?!" I matched her outburst. How dare she say this to me? How dare she?! "If that was true... if you really had wanted to kill me, why am I still here?"

She pursed her lips shut, her brows twitching ever so slightly. I must had been idiotic. Dumb. Courageous yet utterly stupid.

What mortal argued with Satania?

Just when I thought she had given up, she sighed, her emotions depleting, yet her voice continued to hold urgency.

"I don't... want... to see... you... again..."

As her words diminished in the air, she too disappeared, though the clear image of her had remained in my thoughts.

I didn't understand back then as to why I was feeling that way and why Satania had spared me.

Something was flawed.

I must had been flawed...