Camp Kill Yourself

Chapter 02: Green Canoes

It was Vinny that was currently drowning or faking a drowning in the middle of the lake. Rick's canoe was the closest and he was keeping a half-hearted eye on the idiot, making sure that his melodramatics were exactly that and not an actual drowning. "Look!" Vinny catcalled as he leaped out of the water and belly flopped onto his overturned canoe. "I am practicing the art of drowning."

Velma swooned a little at this. "Be still my heart. He's speaking of my one true love."

With her canoe knocking into her friend's, Jenna yawned. "Your love for Davey is a little scary at times."

Ruth took her oar and shoved at the other girl's boat, causing her to nearly tip but ultimately sending her drifting back toward the center of the lake. "Do not knock my Davey!"

As Jenna drifted away, her canoe began to approach Ryan's. At this, she realized that he had somehow fashioned his life-vest into a diaper. She quirked an eyebrow at this and tapped his oar with her own. "Why, pray tell, are you wearing your vest on your crotch?"

Ryan shrugged coolly. "I wanted to protect my most important parts."

She couldn't help it, she erupted into loud guffaws of laughter at this. Before she could recover herself, she heard loud splashing and glanced over her shoulder to see a very waterlogged TJ swimming toward the dock at the center of the lake. 

"WHORE OVERBOARD!" Wednesday shrieked as she paddled her boat toward the dock. She might have been trying to mow down TJ or maybe not. Whatever the case, she was too far from him to succeed.

Ryan smirked at this, glancing at Jenna. "I put $10 bucks on those two hooking up before the end of the summer."

Blue raised one of her pathetically thin eyebrows high. "Wednesday and Thomas? No fucking way. She'd rip his dick off and feed it to the leeches before she'd go anywhere near it."

At this, Ryan grabbed her boat and began guiding the two of them away from the group. "I'm putting my money on it, and a bet is a bet."

"Done," Blue nodded. "I say you are so wrong, Sitkowski!"

Back on the shore, Chris was trying to gently coax Vee into one of the canoes. Or, well, he had succeeded and she was sitting in the boat, but the expression on her face was sheer horror. Spencer watched the pair as Chris worked the green canoe out into the lake, and then jumped in with her. "It's not so scary, see!" he promised her. He grabbed the oar and began paddling them out to the deepest portion of the water. "You have to at least know how to work the canoe, Vee. I don't care if you don't go in one all summer, that's fine, but I cannot in good conscience not teach you how to control one. Just in case. Better safe than sorry and all that shit!"

Vee nodded timidly. The truth was a very mixed bag of realities: on one hand, she could very poorly pilot a canoe if it was necessary, though she was nervous and somewhat terrified and hoped never to do so. On the other hand, the special attention from Chris, the most senior member of the group and, in her opinion, the most devastatingly handsome, was certainly not going to hurt her little ego. And being trapped in a small boat with him? Yeah, not a bad gig if you can get it!