Idol | BTS ( discontinued )

3. Alone

 You made me begin

You made me again. 

- BTS : Begin

-

One hour later and it looked like the company next table was preparing to leave. He wasn't one to spy but he always had a distinct sense of being able to detect others people's emotions. It didn't always make things easy though.

He continued to look at his screen. His edited video capturing the essence of the previous town he visited, was almost done. He could upload it online once he got back to his hotel room. He was waiting for a particular filter to finish applying when he happened to glance at the two women walking away from the table next to him. He continued to look at them, his mind blank until something caught his eye.

His heart thudded unevenly and everything went fuzzy suddenly. He glimpsed a pink keychain in the hands of one of the women, the one who had joined in later. She held the door open for her friend and the keychain in her hand was in full display.

He almost choked up with emotion when he focused on the keychain. It was a pink bunny. It was Cooky.

His Cooky.

-

He was back in his hotel room. The video was finally edited and he was uploading it to the official youtube channel.

It's been years since his hyungs starred in his videos but G.C.F. was his baby, his blood and sweat. So he decided to keep it alive even if the views had considerably lessened over the years. He traveled far and wide, covering everything beautiful with his lens. He converted each visit into a new G.C.F., the memories of the place forever etched in his mind.

He had been to quite a number of places. Some well known, some dangerous, but not one place came close to feeling like home. He just couldn't feel the pull to settle in any of those places. His home, for the major part of his teenage and young adult life, had not been four walls and a roof but rather six elder brothers. Now without that, he felt lost and hopeless. He wandered and wandered but nowhere felt full, safe or complete. Nothing felt like home.

The computer pinged indicating the completion of the upload. He closed the laptop and ordered room service before deciding to take a hot shower.

When he came back, there were two new messages on his phone.

'Beautiful video, Jungkookie. I hope you are happy and traveling safely. Let's meet up when you are back in town' read a message from Jimin. Jungkook smiled at the message. Whenever he uploaded anything new, Jimin was always the first to comment and like. The first to encourage his efforts. Even miles apart, the elder's support never ceased to exist.

He moved on to read the next one. He knew who it was from before even opening it. Another hyung who never failed to silently encourage him.

Min Yoongi.

'Nice place' was all that the message read but Jungkook's eyes teared up. He missed Yoongi. He missed Jimin. He missed them all. All six of them. He missed how it used to be.

He took a deep breath and poured himself a glass of brandy, courtesy of room service. He lay down on his bed and watched as the views and comments came under his video. Some of them nice, some of them not so nice. He didn't mind. He knew criticism and love went hand in hand nowadays. It had hurt him when he had realised that love wasn't unconditional but not anymore.

There were many people who had held his hand, smiled, asked for his autograph, had promised to stand by his side forever but in the end, they simply hadn't.

It shattered him but it didn't turn him bitter. It instead turned him numb. Towards love, towards trust.

Alone and abandoned in a lonely hotel room, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. A single tear rolled down his soft cheek. 

-

a/n : Today, one of my favourite author followed me back and I am so ecstatic. I still can't believe it's real. (*someone pinch me)

Smile a little for me. 

-Kani