We've Made It This Far Kid

Chapter 4

Josh's POV

*Trigger Warning*

I clutched the toilet seat so tightly my knuckles turned white. I shoved two fingers down my throat repeatedly until I threw up the pineapple I had eaten earlier. I stood up shakily and flushed the toilet. I walked over to the sink and used the back of my hand to turn the water on. I washed my hands and wiped my face off. I looked into the mirror. I was a pale mess. I put my head down and shut my eyes against the tears I knew were coming.

I have to leave. I have to leave before Tyler finds out what a mess I am. Before he tries to help me. I can't be helped. None of this can be helped. I would have to go back home and deal with my abusive father. If I'm lucky he will have forgotten about it all and it'll be okay. Yeah, that's it. Everything is going to be fine.

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"Why are you here." He spoke softly and carefully. Making sure so throw each word out, making sure each one landed a solid blow. I crumbled under them. Each word breaking a piece of me off.

"I-I-I-I n-need to-to get, m-my stuff." I stuttered out, too broken to speak clearly.

"Fine. Then you're gone." He didn't even look up from the news paper he was reading, still speaking in the breath snatching tone.

I hung my head and walked to my room. I grabbed a duffle bag and a backpack. I filled the duffle bag with all my clothes and toiletries. I filled my backpack with all my other essential things. Everything I wanted to bring I made fit. I looked around my room for possibly the last time and cried. I sat down on my bed and sobbed silently into my hands.

I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have told anyone. I shouldn't be alive. I shouldn't be alive. I pulled on my hair. I shouldn't be alive. I shouldn't b-. My phone started to ring. I picked it up and saw Tyler's face on the screen. I shoved it back into my pocket. Tyler can't help me. Tyler won't help me. My phone started ringing again. I ignored it again. I picked up my stuff and walked down the stairs. I opened the front door and looked back at my dad. Pleading silently. Wishing that he would say something. Look up. Tell me to stay. Say he's sorry and that he loves me.

But life isn't like that. Life is turning back around with tears in your eyes. Life is shoving the door open and stepping out. Life is closing the door on everything you knew and loved. Life is walking away from that with no plan.
Life is hell, and we're all just walking
on the tightrope of purgatory until we slip up and fall head first into it.

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"Josh? What's wrong?" Brendon opened the door and took in my sad figure.

"I-I'm bisexual." I stuttered out, then broke out sobbing.

"Josh-" Brendon stopped talking and hugged me, "I am too."

That only made me cry harder, "Josh it's okay. I accept you. You're amazing." Brendon whispered to me and rubbed my back.

"I was kicked out." I sobbed into his shoulder.

Brendon tensed, "I'm going to fucking kill your father."

"Bren, no. I-I just need a place to stay." I stifled my sobs a bit.

"He's a fucking douche! How can he fucking do that! Josh he's in-fucking-sane! There's nothing wrong with being anything but straight! Why can't people just fucking accept that!" Brendon yelled at no one.

"Brendon. I just need someplace to stay. I don't want any connections to him anymore." I told him sniffling.

"If you're sure. I trust you Josh. Come on. You can definitely stay with me." Brendon told me leading me inside and upstairs to his room. He went to his closet and pulled out two sleeping bags, a couple pillows, and a lot of blankets. "Is this okay for now?" He asked me.

"Yes, it's great. Thank you so much Brendon. This means so much to me." I told him working on setting up a bed at the end of his.

"No problem. I know you would do the same thing if I was in this situation." He smiled at me and helped me set up.

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Kinda new type of chapter format. What do you guys think? As always vote and comment, I love to see your feedback!!