Midnight memories (One Directional Mix)

chapter 17

Perrie POV: Jes, I am so sorry for all the things that I wish I didn't do. I really don't know how to behave properly in front of Harry. And now, i dragged all of you because of me. I am so sorry.

"Wait, what did I hear? What do you 'with Harry?' ", Jesica said.

"I have no idea how to properly confront Harry, since the day he came back and keep in touch with us. He comforted me all along, because he knows how vulnerable I am. He pity me. Because he knows how his best friend hurt me. So, he came back in behalf of Zayn, to say sorry. Even he never said that, I already knew.", I said.

"Pez, you didn't answer my specific question. What was with Harry that you don't know how to behave yourself? I dont care about effin Zayn. Straight to the point girl", Jesy replied with impatience and irritation.

I hesitated to answer. I need to constract proper sentence to deliver what I really feel.
To Harry, I am his friend, sister , family.
But for me, he is... someone that gives butterfly to my stomach, who wipe and heal my heartache.

" hey, come on Pez. Spill it out.", Jesy snapped me back from reality.

"Jesminda, you are my sister and best friend. Please helpme enlighten, because i am confused and afraid of whatever i am feeling towards Harry," I said.

"Last night, I heard Harry talking to the phone and explaining himself to Simon. I think some mags headlines that he and I are dating, then He said to Simon that we are not. That i am only a sister to him, a family.", i continued.

"Then, you should be Happy Pez. Why are you so worried and sad?", jesy exclaimed.

"Because it hurt me to hear that...", i said with tear fell down from my face. "I think i fell in love with him, Jes".

"Oh...", Jes said in a surprised. "That is somehow complicated..." she continued.  "Because, look. Harry is really a charming, kind man where every Girl in town will fall in love with. He also have power in flowery words. I dont want to discourage you, but i wanted to help you to stay away from that thoughts or feelings you have because I know you will just get hurt again. And I don't want it to happen. If he really carea as a brother, then be it. Pezza there's more men outside who deserve your love. But please, not with Harry. Harry is a boyfriend of everybody even his fans dont want him to get one romantic partner. And i think he is that type of a man, too.", Jesy said.

I felt ache inside as Jesy told me that.  How judgemental she is, she doesn't even know who is Harry now. But yes, I knowit too. That being with means, you will gonna risk everything especially when it comes to media and fans. Some will hate you, or love you. Oh, this is me again a hopeless lover who eventually get hurt in the end. Becaise I know, this is a one sided love that i decide to keep hidden.

I keep silent as Jesy gave me a lot of words against my feelings for him. I didn't bother to contradict her, because I know she has a point except on being judgmental with Harry.

*sighs.

(Tok.tok. tok.-someone knock on the door).

"It's open. Just come in." Jesy yelled.

Then speaking of, Harry came on a white V neck shirt. I saw his face with a little bruises, but still he looks beautiful and gorgeous. My heart beating faster that I wanted to hide, but no. I need to supress this feelings for him.

"Hi. May I talk to you?", Harry said looking at me.

"Uhmm, about what Haz? I already talked to her, dont worry. About her misbehavior last night and she forgets everything. How funny", Jesy continues.

Awkward silent stepped in. While Harry looking at me seriously.

"Jes, pls. Just a minuted.", Harry said.

"Okay. Okay. I will leave you two. I will just go follow Leigh and jade. Do you have anything in mind, so I can buy?", Jesy said to me.
"None, thanks Jes", I said while Jesy is making a face that signalled to behave.
I just smiled at her. Then she leave us in the room.

Harry stood still, unable to say words to start the conversation.

"Uhmm, I am planning to talk and look for you when I woke up.. but you are not here.. so..", I started.

"I, aii Just want to apologize. And say thank you, too for what you did for me Last night. I promise, i will never do anything to make you worry guys.", i continued casually.

Harry smiled.

"Oh, that's the only thing you want to say?", je replied.
And I started to be nervous becaise maybe he heard us awhile ago?.

"Do I need to say more?, i think thats all.", i said sarcastically but cheerfully.

"Oh i see.", harry said smiling. His dimples is visible that will keep you staring at him.

"So I've thought. You came here to talk to me. So..  what do you want to say?", I said just to throw my tension and back to casual converation.

"I, I came here to talk to you about something, Perrie.", he said.

"About what?", I said. And he looks at me seriously that I really don't have any idea what it is all about.