Depressive life

Part 7

DAYS LATER
We had to do a project, for the project we had to wear a special costume, but I was lucky, it was long sleeves, so my cut wouldn't be shown. But while presenting, I came to know that the sleeve was going up little by little, but nobody noticed.
After the project, I immediately changed my clothes and put on my jacket. When I went out, Emma (not a very close classmate that I had, but a good person) told me that she wanted to talk to me later, and I was like "ok?"...
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AFTER SCHOOL
While I was waiting for my taxi as usual. Emma had come to talk to me about my cuts. I didn't know what to tell her so I just told her: " I was just a bit stressed, and I over exaggerated a bit too much". When I looked at her, she looked at me with the "very upset" look. I don't think she believed it. "Not buying it" she told me, I didn't know what to answer, and while I was thinking of an excuse, and acting as if I was getting ready to tell her, my taxi came, "perfect timing!!" I told to myself, so I told her that I had to go, or else they will scold at me. She gave me that angry look and turned around to her way home, I let out a deep breath, crossed the road, and got into my taxi. On my way, I started to think a lot about my cut, and when I reached home too. Ugh... I just wanna die... why can't I just kill my self, and get over with it? Why?... i didn't know what to do anymore, live, or die... if I killed myself nobody would even care, not even my parents. But if I don't kill myself I can continue enjoying my friends, but Sefer till death with stress. Well, I DID want to know if I was really depressed or just a bit stressed, so I started to investigate in google, BUT, my MOM had to come to ruin everything. She asked me: what are you doing on your phone?
- a school project investigation-
-give me your phone and go do it in the computer-
-but the computer is SO slow - I answered
- I don't care- she answered with a lot of anger.
So I had to listen to her, I gave her my phone and went to investigate about depression in the computer.
When I read what depression was about, I realized....