gay ➳ reddie ✓

41

updated yesterday and day before.. don't forget to read those chapters first :)

Tuesday. July 7, 1987

"I let my guard down." Eddie rolled his eyes. "I didn't want to fall for it. I kept telling myself he was just drunk. I knew he'd take it back. He's such a dick!" 

Will sighed, floating on his back in the calm quarry water while Eddie continued to rant by his side. Eddie had been at it for over twenty minutes, going on about how he couldn't believe he'd fallen for it. Will was growing more and more wrinkly  by the minute. He didn't like to see Eddie so upset but he didn't see any way of helping the boy in such a complicated situation. In all reality, Will mostly wanted to enjoy his summer and was beginning to think that Eddie and Richie's relationship  was draining him. 

"I'm sorry, Eddie." Was all he could say. Eddie sighed this time, swimming towards land without another word. As he was drying off, Richie walked over with Elle and Mike by his side. Will gulped, knowing now was not the time for Richie to be himself right now. Not when Eddie was so upset. 

"Hey, babe. Leaving so soon? We were just about to go for a swim." Richie smiled, raising an eyebrow at Eddie and yeah, no, this was not happening today. Eddie scoffed, shoving past Richie before mumbling over his shoulder. 

"Don't call me babe." He said. Richie was left dumbfounded, watching Eddie walk away with his sidekick chasing after him. Elle crossed her arms and Mike gave Richie a questioning look. 

"Lover's quarrel?" Mike asked. Richie shook his head.

"I don't know what his problem is." Richie was embarrassed. Eddie should know better than to blow him off like that, especially in front of Elle. He rolled his eyes waving a goodbye to his friends before following Eddie back to their cabin.

His strides were larger than the two smaller boys' so it wasn't long before he caught up with the pair. 

"Eddie!" Richie snapped, glancing back to make sure Elle and Mike weren't in sight. 

"What the fuck do you want, trashmouth?" Eddie groaned. Richie was taken aback, what was his problem? 

"Will, would you mind, like, leaving?" Richie was growing annoyed. Will ignored him.

"Will can stay, fuck you." Eddie spat.

"Jesus christ, Will get the fuck out of here. I need to speak to my boyfriend." Will's eyes widened and he finally walked away, cursing under his breathe.

"He knows it's fake, you know." Eddie crossed his arms, continuing on his walk to their cabin, not caring if Richie was done or not.

"Whatever, he should know better than to butt in to our conversations." Richie followed the boy all the way inside and Eddie went straight to the bathroom, closing the door. 

Richie ran to it, frustrated with the smaller's lack of cooperation.

"Eddie, what the fuck  was that?" Richie wiggled the doorknob. "Are you trying to get us exposed? What is wrong with you? You're being so weird."

The door flew open, Richie stumbled backwards because now it was Eddie's turn to yell and the look on his face was scaring Richie. Eddie stepped closer and pushed the boy as hard as he could. The taller boy fell backwards with a yelp, to both of their surprise. 

"What the hell is wrong with you! Why are you being such an ass?" Richie adjusted his glasses.

"Me?" Eddie yelled. "I'm the ass? What about you!" Richie was lost. He had no idea what was making Eddie so angry all of a sudden.

"Yes! You're acting so weird. I thought we were fine." Richie argued. His mind wandered back to the night they were drinking and he considered it had something to do with that. 

"Yeah, fine. We're fine." Eddie stared him down. Richie felt bad, for a second. Eddie stepped over him, walking to his bed before plopping down on it. 

"Eddie," Richie trailed off, calming down as he realized it was something bigger. 

"I don't want to talk about it." Eddie covered his face. 

"Eds, you've been different. I tried to ignore it but there's something bugging you, isn't there." Richie got up from the floor and approached the boy's bed. This was the Richie that made Eddie so confused. The Richie that made him think he could be happy if it were real. 

"I can't-" Eddie started. "I don't even know what to say because I don't know what to think. I don't know what's wrong because I'm not fully sure what I want." 

"Does any of this even make sense?" Eddie asked.

"Not really." Richie shrugged but urged Eddie to go on. 

"I think, I don't know. The kiss." Eddie raised his gaze to see Richie's reaction but the boy stayed expressionless. "I kind of didn't hate it? The first one, I mean."

Richie nodded. "Okay."

"I mean, It's not like I like you? I don't really know. Maybe I just liked the kissing? I hadn't ever kissed anyone before. What if I'm gay?" Eddie was rambling now. Richie didn't know what to say, it was all sudden to him and he didn't understand how Eddie felt comfortable talking about such feelings. 

"Maybe you should try kissing someone else?" Richie suggested, apprehensively. 

"But what if," Eddie paused, afraid of Richie's reaction, especially after what had happened on the fourth. "What if it's you. Not the kiss."

"Eddie, you don't want me." Richie shut it down without a second thought. "You can't. I'm not a person that anyone can take seriously. I promise this shit you feel will pass and honestly if you are gay, that's fine too. But you don't want me. I can't be good for anyone. Not like you deserve." 

"Except Elle, right?" Eddie spoke bitterly. Richie sighed. 

"No." Richie rubbed the back of his neck. He didn't think he'd be sharing so much. "Nobody, Eds. I can't. It just wouldn't work, you know?" 

Eddie didn't know. He let Richie go on, though. The boy had so much hidden inside of him, so much behind all of the jokes he spat out. 

"I can't love anyone like that, I'm not good for it. Once shit gets serious, I get out. It's who I am. They made me like that." Richie's voice was shaky and Eddie grew worried.

"They?" He questioned. Richie was shaking, now. His lips were trembling and he was on the brink of tears. Eddie panicked, reaching his arms out and pulling Richie into a hug.

"They don't care about me, Eds. They never have. My parents treat me like shit, so how can I treat anyone right?" He cried into Eddie's shoulder, a similar feeling to when Eddie did the same only weeks before. 

"You can't let them define you. You're capable of love, we all are." Eddie tried.

"I think you should kiss Will." Richie said, ignoring Eddie's words altogether. Eddie pulled away, eyes flashing all over Richie's face as he processed the boy's words. He hadn't considered Will before. It made sense, though. Will was gay. Will was his friend. Will treated him with respect. 

"To test it is you really want." Richie said easily. "If he's not what you want, I'll help you figure it all out. I was a shitty friend as a kid but I'm gonna make it right, now." 

"Okay." Eddie sighed. "I'll do it."

  ➳  ➳➳ 

so richie is opening up? a little? i guess? idk. and welp i guess eddie and will are gonna kiss... i dont make the rules here lmao

- kat

august 14, 2018  

12:35 pm