The Crew | On Hold

Chapter 21

Surprise takes over me. Found someone? Heck, we can't even be together. Has Andrew said something to my mother, giving her false hope? No matter how much I like him, I will hang him, if he makes my mother sad at least for a second. Dad has done that a lot in his past. I've promised myself ever since dad started sleeping around with other women, that I would protect mom and try my very best to always cheer her up. Giving her false hope isn't going to cheer her up.

I want to protest, to explain to her and Andrew, who seems to forget it, that we can't possibly be together. We're cast mates. I need my job. I won't risk it for any romance. Not until I have a steady job that doesn't care about my relationship. And not while Andrew is still my cast mate, and Anna - our boss. She's literally the sweetest human being I've ever met, and I would never want to feel the wrath of her anger fall over me.

My brain is racing with millions of thoughts, but all I manage as an answer is a nervous giggle, and a sip of Andrew's tea. He gives me an amused look as I drink his tea, but doesn't comment on it.

Deciding it's time to get Andrew away from my mother before she starts to like him too much, I get up from Andrew's lap quickly when he's not expecting it. "Mom, if you could excuse us, we were going to have a work-related chat in my room." I announce, and march out of the room after giving Andrew a 'follow me or die' look. 

I am already on the stairway, as I hear Andrew excuse himself, too, to my mother, and, to my shock, he, too, calls her Tanya, which usually would offend my mom, when Marcus called her that, but now she just says "Sure, honey, go ahead.", surprising me. It's alien for me to have my mother be nice to my... boyfriend? No, he's just my colleague, but mom apparently thinks we're together. Hell, I'm gonna have to find a way to tell her the truth. She's gonna be so sad, but I don't want her to keep thinking that she's gonna have grand-babies anytime soon.

Andrew catches up with me just as I'm about to open my bedroom door. Taking my hand into his again, he doesn't say anything, just follows me into my room. I blush, seeing that a teddy bear my mom bought me when I was 5 is still on the bed, and that there are books scattered on the floor from when I had a free time to read, but not enough of that time to clean it up.

Andrew releases my hand and walks over to the wall on his right, where a lot of pictures are hanging from a laundry rope in a DIY fashion, done by me in my freshman year. A lot of the pictures are with me and mom, my friends and even my cousins, but there are none with my father, and Andrew quickly catches on.

"Why isn't your dad in the pictures?" He asks, examining a picture of me and Trinity, my high school best friend, who I still see quite often. She, too, has daddy issues, so she was mostly the only one who really understood what I was going through.

I hesitate for a second. "I didn't want him to be there."

Andrew turns to me, worry clear in his eyes. "Did your parents get a divorce?" His voice is quiet and velvety, surprisingly making me want to talk to him more. To explain why my dad isn't there. Why I love my mother so much. Why I hate seeing my father's face next to all of the people I care about.

I nod, dropping my gaze to the old parquet on my bedroom floor. In about a second, I hear light footsteps nearing me, and then Andrew's scent and body consumes me, as he pulls me into a hug. I'm the perfect height for him to hug me - my head ends just below his chin, and, when he hugs me, I can hear his heartbeat, which makes me feel safe and calm. 

The warmth of his hug consumes me, and I don't even notice that we're moving, but somehow we end up on my bed, me on Andrew's chest.

"Tell me." He encourages, hugging me tighter. 

And I do. I tell him everything in the comfort of his embrace and warmth - how my mother caught him with his secretary that he swore he wasn't sleeping around with. How I accidentally eavesdropped on her conversation with my godmother, as she broke down and told her about her unfaithful husband. I tell him how I hate seeing my father's face. How I ditched his wedding to that same secretary. How he doesn't really care about me anymore. How he calls me rarely, only to act interested in my life. How me and my mother lived without money, because she couldn't work anymore, but I was not eligible to work. 

I also tell him why this job is so important to me, and why I can't let myself fall for him any more, because if I do, I will end up just like Bethany.

After a half an hour, I'm silently sobbing in his chest as he strokes my hair lovingly. I've never told anyone the whole story, only the jist of things. I didn't realise I'd ever get the chance to reveal my feelings towards Andrew to anyone, especially Andrew himself, but now that it's out in the universe, it feels like a massive weight from my chest has been lifted. At least for a little while.

When my sobs quietly die down, and I'm left with a runny nose and painfully dry eyes, Andrew reaches for my face. Placing his fingers under my chin, he forces me to look into his eyes. At first I don't obey to his gentle attempts to make me look at him, since I look disgusting and I'm ashamed that he has to see me in such a state, but Andrew doesn't give up. Finally, I give in, and my eyes meet his grey eyes, filled with wonder and a sea of other feelings.

"Emma, I love you. I knew I'd love you since I laid my eyes on you."

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