the little things || Connor x Female!Reader [Detroit: Become Human]

chapter 9 || emotion .

JAN 24TH, 2039
PM 02:37:19

The house was silent, though peaceful. 

Connor removed his quarter coin from his pocket and began to flick it around, back and forth. Now and then he'd throw the coin upwards and attempt to catch it by the palm of his hand. Although this seemed to keep him occupied, his thoughts were still in a state of disorder — he couldn't seem to organize them. This left him awfully bemused.

He stopped his little coin tricks when (Name) entered the room.

She turned to look at him, curious as to why he stopped what he was doing to just — just look at her. Had she done something wrong? He didn't seem to show any signs of distaste towards her presence, but ... the atmosphere feels incredibly awkward now.

"Is there anything you need?" She expressed a quizzical look, "You don't seem like yourself today."

He averted his gaze, "I was ... just wondering about something."

(Name) nodded at his response, and began to walk towards the couch. He scooted over to give her some space, giving it a few pats — it was a habit of (Name)'s, patting the space and all, and she was quite amused that it seemed to rub off on him too.

"What were you wondering about?" She sat down besides him. Connor seemed to be deep in thought, as his LED was thoroughly fixated on yellow. For a moment, he just stared at his quarter coin. 

Eventually, he glanced at (Name) and replied, "Human emotion. How can androids really feel emotion? Is it something that we can just recognize in our system? Is it a legitimate emotion, or is it the simulation of it?"

(Name) looked at her hands and sighed. It may be a genuinely difficult question to ponder about, but it seemed to trouble him. If anything, it made her feel compelled to find the answer — even if it may be impossible to do. She chose to think long and hard about her response, although her ideas didn't seem to match up in her head.

"Surely you're feeling authentic emotions, Connor. CyberLife didn't plan to add anything like that into your programs, did they?"

Connor perked his head up, "Emotions are subjective internal experiences. They require certain physical conditions, which are mental and physiological states."

"Physiological states?" (Name)'s expressions changed from calm to confused in a matter of sheer seconds.

"Physiological is defined as the relation to the branch of biology in which deals with the normal functions of—"

(Name) interrupted him, "I know what that means! It— it has to do with living organisms ... physiological is that study where it deals with the activity of organisms and its parts — something like that."

Connor nodded, smiling out of mere amusement, "That's correct."

"So ... what's with this mental and physiological state?"

"Well," Connor paused, letting himself process the words that he formed in his mind. It was difficult to evoke, his explanation, and it took him a bit longer than he'd like before he could begin his little reasoning. "Androids, other than the YK500, weren't designed to have these 'mental' and 'physiological' states. We weren't designed to eat, sleep, or drink — these things are human necessities, although they do play a role when you feel emotions."

"So ... since you don't have these 'features' in your program, you're not able to feel these subjective, internal experiences without difficulty?"

"Correct."

"Bullshit."

Connor looked at her incredulously, "Excuse me?"

"Why are you so caught up in this idea that androids can't feel emotions?" She was gentle with her words, but was very firm. Connor felt conflicted, realizing that he wasn't sure how he managed to come up with the bizarre idea — although it did captivate him at some point.

Eventually, he averted his gaze. 

"I— it's because of dating." He paused, "It's a very new thing for me. I'm not ... particularly aware of the qualities that come with it — although I can do a quick search to gather information on the subject, as it is one of my features."

(Name) raised a brow, "Oh, really now?"

"Maybe," He smiled, "but I can try."

She slowly shook her head, letting a grin plaster upon her features. For a little while, (Name) sat there, thinking about her past dating experiences and how it may help Connor. There was only a few tips that she could come up with, considering that her past relationships didn't go too well.

"Well, first of all, just know that the emotions that you're feeling is authentic. You're a deviant, so that's how you know that it's not in your programs."

"So if I'm not a deviant, I won't like you?" 

(Name) blinked. "Oh, well that's up to you."

"Anyways," She mindlessly fiddled with her thumbs. "android and human relationships aren't exactly common, but there's nothing wrong with it — at least in my opinion. It may be weird at first, but if the love is there, then the journey's worth it."

"So how do we ... date? I've read from an article that every person has their own preferences, so I believe that you would have a different idea for a date, as opposed to another person."

(Name) smiled lightly, letting the corners of her eyes crinkle. Connor assumed that the statement blissfully amused her. "Well, on first dates, you shouldn't kiss them right away — that's a big no no." She briefly hummed, as if mindlessly musing her thoughts.

"Although," She began again, slightly furrowing her brows in thought. "if your partner gives you permission, you can hold their hand, or maybe peck them on the cheek. I don't know, it depends on the person. Some people may still find that weird, though, for a first date."

"And what would you want?" Connor was genuinely curious. 

"For a first date?"

He nodded.

"I'm not so sure, in all honesty. Maybe it would be okay to stay home and catch up on some movies and eat my favorite food."

"When should we plan it, then?" Connor began to stand up, his blue LED flashing. Was he ordering something...?—

At that moment, (Name) was awfully befuddled. He was definitely not ordering something now, was he?

"Connor, not right now! "

=

well, connor is trying to be more affectionate.

he'll get there eventually.