Tom Holland & Peter Parker Imagines

Does It Feel Good To Be Bad? | P.P

Summary: After losing everything, Peter gives up his life saving ways for a life of crime and causing havoc on the streets of Queens. But you'll always be his weakness, so when Peter hears your screams one night he can't help but come to the rescue.

Words: 1435

Peter use tell himself that the world was testing him to see how much be could take. He'd promise himself that whatever happened he'd use his abilities for good, refusing to turn to the dark side.

He found an indescribable joy in saving the people of queens but the thrill he got from causing havoc, it was beyond anything you could ever image. It was sickening.

Who would've thought the spectacular Spider Man would go bad? Definitely not Tony Stark when he supplied the Spider with enough weapons in his suit to take out a whole city.

But the universe took it too far when they took May. It practically tore her away from his grasp and laughed as he screamed and begged her lifeless body to come back. Peter Parker knew pain, god he knew pain better than anyone, so why was he the only one that had to feel so horrible?

Peter had always been a good kid. Never skipped school, always listened to his guardians, never hurt others. In fact for the longest time he saved others, So why was he being punished?

He'd practically lost everyone he cared about, his mom, dad, uncle Ben, aunt May. The only person who hadn't been painfully torn out of his life was you. No he just pushed you away.But man did he miss you. He missed walking down the hallway at school with you, catching up on previous days events, he missed sitting on his balcony with you and a bowl full of gummy candies. (He always made sure to get the ones with extra gummy bears, knowing they were your favourite)

He even missed the small things like holding your hand on the bus trip home, quick kisses between classes and the odd night he'd sneak into your window for cuddles.

Even now, you were the only thing that could make him weak at the knees.

"Karen, nightly overview please" Peter spoke, waiting a few moments for the computer system to get the information he'd asked for.

"Sure Peter" Karen spoke. "You have successfully broken the front windows to the restaurant down fifth, webbed up a large range of cars outside the Deli and caused havoc and concern on the freeway. Well done"

Peter smiled to himself, proud of his accomplishments although a part of him felt guilt. He'd gone from Queen's savior, someone everyone wanted to be around and catch a glimpse of to a menace.

Peter thought about May and his uncle Ben for a second, they wouldn't be proud of him for doing this, they'd be ashamed, but they weren't here anymore. He tried to focus on the rush of adrenaline instead of the guilt. Instead he thought of you, you wouldn't be proud either. God you'd be so disgusted

A sudden scream pulled Peter from his thoughts, it was blood curdling and caused his ears to ring and in any other case he would've ignored the scream, possibly even turned on his heels and walked in the opposite direction. But he recognised that scream as yours. His heart shuttered and without a second thought Peter headed off, using his webs to get their faster.

If you died- if you got hurt even, Peter would never forgive himself.

Peter found you, outside your building with a frightened look on your face. You had tears, both fresh and dry on your cheeks and he couldn't even attempt to ignore the ache he felt in his chest. This was the first time he'd seen you since he pushed you out of his life as if you were nothing but garbage, in reality Peter knew you were much more. You still looked as beautiful as he remembered.

He almost missed it when you turned your head, his eyes instantly widened when he realised that you were watching him too.

You stared at Peter, the boy you'd not too long ago given everything too. What stared back was just the corpse of the boy you'd once loved.

"What happened? Are you okay?" He asked, sadness practically dripping from his voice.

He noticed a small cut on your cheek and felt the overwhelming urge to tend to it.

You scoffed "Mug attempt, I fought him off"

You watched as Peter turned around, ready to walk away and pretend like this little run in didn't happen.

"Does it feel good to be bad, Peter?" You say boldly, your voice echoes through the alley and if Peter had any energy or motivation left, he would've told you to hush. "Does it feel good to know that you're the one causing so much stress and trouble in these people's lives?"

Peter spun around, stopping dead in his tracks.

"You know Delmar? The one that owned the Deli we use to go to every week" You ask, your voice cracking lightly at the end. Peter nods. "He sold it last week, couldn't afford to keep paying for new windows and paint to repaint his signs.

"Stop! I just- I just wanted everyone else to feel the same amount of pain I feel. I lost everyone Y/N, including you as it turns out" Peter practically hisses the last words. He was almost speechless.

"You didn't lose me god damn it! I was by your side every night for a week after May died" You remembered holding him every night while he cried himself to sleep. Even when he was sleeping, he had a tighter than normal grip on your waist as if he was afraid of you slipping away too. "I wasn't going to leave, but you pushed me away. You stopped answering my messages, you didn't come to my room, you dropped out of school. I went to our place every day for 2 weeks after you disappeared hoping that maybe you'd show up but you never did."

"But what if I let you stay? It was only a matter of time before you got hurt too and I couldn't live with that" Peter knew it was no use trying to defend himself. He took a few steps forward, as a result making you take the same amount of steps back.

"You're right, it was only a matter of time before i got too. But not physically Peter, by you" You wipe away your tears, refusing to let Peter see you as anything less than strong and held together. "You did the thing that hurt me more than anything else ever could. You pushed me away like I was nothing"

It was then that Peter felt his heart shatter, It was also then that he realised he was still in love with you.

"Look Y/N, I'm sorry and I know that saying sorry simply won't make this better, in fact nothing could make up for what I've done and not only to you but to everyone. I want to get everything back on track. I've done some really horrible things over the last few weeks and I want to fix them. I'm meant to be Spiderman for crying out loud! I'm meant to save people"

You looked at Peter and for the first time that night saw the boy that you fell in love with. You saw the Peter that cared and wanted to do his best for the people he loved, but you always saw the Peter that was scared.

"You're right, a sorry won't fix it and I-I shouldn't open my arms back up to you but I know you, you have one of the biggest hearts Peter"

It was dark out, but when a hint of light from the street lights shone through the alley you could see Peter was close to an absolute breakdown. You pulled the broken boy into your arms, sighing at the familiar feeling. He reached his arms around you and held you tight, almost like he would for the first few nights after May's death. Peter was home with you, he knew, you knew it.

It was true when they say that there's always someone that brings out the good in you, you did that for Peter.

Between his sniffles and the light rain that suddenly appeared you almost missed Peter mutter an 'I love you'.

It wasn't the first time he'd said it, in fact you use to say it to each other quite often but now it was different.

"I know, I know" You whispered. You couldn't say the words back yet, but you loved him and he knew that. You both needed time to heal after the past few months events. "I've got you now"