What's My Name?

Bullshit Filler Chapter pt. 3

Three Months Later

I walked into my apartment, my lovely puppy greeting me as I enter.

"Hello, my tiny bundle of joy!" He had gotten bigger, and his bark was actually becoming intimidating. "Where's Maria with my other bundle of joy?"

"I'm right here, and I find it a bit weird that you put your puppy and your baby in the same category." She says jokingly, a phone on her hand.

"I mean, they're lovely souls. They both eat, shit, and sleep all day, so what's the difference?"

"Whatever idiot. Rudy left his phone over here last night and he's been getting phone calls all day."

She hands me the phone. When I turn it on, the lock screen is of him and Nova, a Snapchat filter over their faces.

"Awe, they're starting to look more alike."

"I'll see you later, Victoria. I got a lunch date with my boyfriend downtown. I should be home around ten."

After seeing Maria off I go to check up on Nova. She's playing in her playpen rather happily, but her butt stinks.

"Mommy's little monster made a poo?" Hearing my voice she begins doing a weird rocking thing, or a failed attempt at crawling. But nonetheless, she is excited that I'm home. "Come on, let's get the little bumblebee changed."

I pick her up and look at how gorgeous she was. She had sandy brown hair and her lips were a beautiful shade of pink.

I was starting to doubt that this was my child too. And I pushed her out!

When I finished changing her I placed her back in the playpen, and she went back to doing her thing.

"Such a good little baby, she is isn't she?"

Pimmit hands crept around my shoulders, and his smile could be heard through his voice.

"I didn't hear you come in. Good afternoon Pimmit," I turn around to face him, his hair and clothes neat from work. "You smell good today, what's the occasion?"

His face goes blank for a second, and then he grabs me by the waist, his face fixing itself.

"No occasion, I just wanted to smell good," Leaning in to kiss me, he stops right before my lips. "That's not a problem, is it?"

Yes. It is. Because you smell like a bitch.

"No, not at all." I kiss his lips, my arms wrapping around his neck. "God, I've missed this. You and your-"

"Shut up and let me show you how much I've missed this," He pushes me on the bed, his eyes shining with a look I know all too well. Taking off his shirt, he picks me up and places me on his lap, his bulge already prominent. "Maybe this time we'll get a Rudy Jr."

I hope not.