We left nothing, but our paw prints in the snow

Chapter 31

A/N: Sorry, this chapter is really short, but it felt right to end it where I did :)

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I stopped living in my fantasy world and sought out Pup. She was lying with some other younger female wolves. I noted that Pup was shivering. Her strange pelt, that had at the beginning covered almost her whole body now looked shaggy and unkempt, and left a lot more of her skin exposed. I wondered if she would survive the cold of the winter.

“Pup,” I gestured and she sprung up. This time she followed me on only her hind paws. She ran like that, but I'd noticed she'd been walking like that less. But she stood taller than ever before. Taller. Her back was straight, something it hadn't been in a long time, and I think she'd grown. I wondered if all humans grew in spurts.

“What?” she asked me.

“You wanted to talk,” I promted.

“Right. Um…” her tense body signalled insecurity. “They've been calling me.”

“What? Who's been calling you? How? I haven't heard anything.”

Pup shook her head. When she did that, it meant 'no'.

I nudged her shoulder in prompt for her to continue.

“Home.”

Understanding washed over me. It was scary. It felt like a tidal wave of things I didn't understand. But I understood now, and understanding was heavy, a weight I had to bear. It wasn't as I had thought. Pup wasn't staying here because she had liked it, or for any other reason. She was staying here because of me. I was trapping her. She was my prisoner. And I had to let her go. But would she be okay? Would this vulnerable human survive alone? I was worried about her. Is this what Mate had been talking about? That I should trust her? Had he known all along what was happening? Was he worried about me too?

I sighed, then told Pup to go for it.

Pup smiled her smile, and it seemed so human in that moment. She wasn't a wolf, I reminded myself. Her spirit might have been a bit wolf-like, but she was still a human. And she belonged with humans. She'd grown up now. She was older now. And she deserved to be trusted. Especially by me.

“Oh, Pup I'm so sorry.”

She turned to look at me, stunned. Normally she behaved more like a wolf. We all avoided eye contact unless in a display of dominance. But she looked me right in the eye. It wasn't a challenge, and it wasn't meant to be rude in any way. It was human, and so alien to me that I felt goosebumps form under my fur. I shook my body, ridding it of that prickly feeling. But one look back at her and I noticed that she was still looking, peering into my very soul, and the goosebumps returned.

“I'll leave soon, then. Are you okay?”

I confirmed and went for a run. I hadn't run on my own since the summer. And it felt strange. Should I ask Mate for help, again? I always went to him. He came to me sometimes too, but I felt the need to figure this out on my own.

The snow covered floor raced by underneeth my in a blur of white. The surrounding trees melted into each other as I passed them. I risked a glanse skyward and growled in pleasure, feeling the sun beat down on my back. This is what it means to be alive. This and making love to Mate.

Without realising it I had been running towards the edge of our territory, the edge of our territory and the humans' territory.

And what I saw made the skin under my fur crawl.