You Push Me, I Push Back

XIV

After my talk with Alex, I was freaked out, I couldn't pay attention in class without my mind rushing to him. I could feel his gaze on me in every lesson he had the chance, I was getting frustrated. It doesn't make sense. He broke up with me, remember? Not me breaking up with him. When he broke up with me, we had just gone for a walk in the woods, when Alex told me, I played it off well, stating that it was okay and gave him a "goodbye" kiss on the cheek. It was also weird because he had tears in his eyes and when I walked away, all I could hear was was quiet crying. I lied about Alex being a boyfriend you don't cry over, I did cry, but only for one night, because I was a woman, I didn't need to cry over a boy.

But Alex was a boy you cried, and probably all the girls he has fucked have cried over him because they found it meant nothing when they had sex. Alex and I were together for six months, my virginity was already gone because of a accidental (and stupid) one night stand, so he had no way to take it from me. When we were together (after months of Alex flirting with me and trying to get me on a date) we were actually known to be a couple, everyone knew Alex was pining for me and yeah, that made some girls angry at me for "stealing their man" but it didn't stop me from dating him.

We would go on dates, hold hands around anywhere, have cute make out sessions, my mum invited him for dinner or even to family breakfast on Sunday. He was really apart of the family at some point, I guess now he is. We were literally the definition of "couple". Two months into the relationship and Alex was already telling me he loved me, it took some time for me to give off the same feeling because he was still known for being a player, but he waited for me and didn't mind if it took time, he understood me. I didn't realise how alike we were until the third date.

Then out of the blue, he tells me we are breaking up, it was one of those "it's not you, it's me" break ups. He didn't give me a reason only telling me that it was for my own good. I came to the conclussion that he was always a player and never truly loved me, even though he said he did. Numerous times. Many times I tried to get an answer, but nothing came, for two monthe he disppeared, the all of a sudden he's back and I am left to be near him.

I knock on the wooden door three times, it had recently been painted over (for some reason) and now had some wonky places where the painted had dried off unevenly. I had asked Angel to drop me off at my house and wait outside so I could get a couple of things - knowing that mum or Danny won't be back for another hour - but I ended up knocking Alex's bedroom door. A moment later, when I consider the idea to run, the door opens and Alex is in front me. He is only a couple of centimetres taller then me so I can just meet his eyes.

"Hey, uh, come in." Alex says, believing that I wanted to come inside his "chamber". I nod and give a smioe before walking inside. I look around his room, blue painted walls, pictures of soccer players and rugby players. The occasional pictures of his parents and friends, and then the one of us on his bedside coffee table. Which I was surprised to see, not only was it there but I didn't know he even kept it. "I, uh, decided to keep the photos of us, I know it's a bit weird but, uh, I don't have any explanation."

I didn't question him about it only said, "I got rid of them." Which made him frown but nod his head to cover it up. I walked towards the end of his bed and sat down on it. Alex soon joined me but kept a space between us. "I don't bite."

"Having made out with you and had sex with you, I would disagree." Alex comments, I roll my eyes and scoff, my smile somewhat forming a little.

"Says you, I swear you were trying to get me in trouble with my mum." I reply turning to dace him, seeing he was already looking at me. He didn't reply and now, we were only looking at each other. "D-do you remember the time when my mum came in on us making out and ran out only to come back with condoms?"